Remember Me
by LadyRaye
Summary: AU: William 'Spike' Giles has always been a badass. With his father never there he has his Step-Mum Anya to raise him. What happens when he gets into trouble? And who's the boy he helps when the girl he's in love with becomes terribly ill?
1. Trouble

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing except the plot. If I did own any of it, Joss Whedon would have some serious explaining to do but seeing as how I don't. Well then. I own nothing. Nada. Zilch. I'm a college student are you getting the idea?  
  
A/N: Okay, this is my first try at Spuffyness. Its completely about Buffy and Spike although there is some Spike and Drusilla moments because well, she was his first 'love'. Anyways, please tell me what you think. Honestly. But don't do it with cruel and malice (although I have yet to see that) I'm just a college girl trying to exist in the harsh harsh world. I did take the basic idea from "A Walk To Remember" for those who haven't seen it. This is NOTHING like it. However, I won't promise that no one will die. Hope you like.  
  
William 'Spike' Giles smiled as he and his friends drove up to the pier. It was after Homecoming and it was barely twelve-thirty as he took another swig of beer. Leaning against his car he smirked as Drusilla walked up to him, kissing him softly. Wrapping one arm around her he kissed back, keeping his beer in his hand. Watching their friends dance around like idiots was the funniest thing Spike had seen in awhile. He and his friends Zach Montoya, Angel O'Riley, and Michael Jacobs had been together since freshman year and now they were in their senior year of high school. Spike's thoughts shifted as Drusilla kissed him on the cheek lightly.  
  
"Come on luv.let's play under the stars." She whispered to him. Spike held back a chuckle, Dru was the crazy type.always wanting to play under the stars and thinking they talked to her. Keeping his feet firmly planted he shook his head.  
  
"Not right now luv, I don't dance, you know that."  
  
"Mmm, naughty little boy. The stars want you to dance and you won't listen to them." Spike rolled his eyes.  
  
"Dru, you know I don't believe that."  
  
"Then what do you believe?" Spike chuckled, pulling Drusilla close as he kissed her.  
  
"I don't believe in anything. Not a single thing." Kissing Dru hard on the mouth he dropped the beer on the ground, not really caring about it much more. Slowly his mind went from having fun with his friends to just having fun with Dru. Smirking as their kiss broke and he noticed his friends had the same idea with their girls he and Dru made their way into the back of his jeep...  
  
Spike awoke to the sound of sirens. Looking up he sighed and pulling up his pants he zipped them and grabbing his shirt he shook his head and took out a cigarette.  
  
"Bloody 'ell."  
  
"You were arrested for hanging out with those boys I told you not to and to make things worse you were drinking?" Anya Giles exclaimed as she got her son home. Shaking her head she gave him one look that Spike knew all too well. It meant he was supposed to sit down. Sighing he sat down and shook his head, rubbing his eyes. He had one hell of a hang over and his step- Mums voice wasn't helping. His father, Rupert Giles, was a well-known businessman that like most famous ones, traveled around a lot. He had met Anya (then Jenkins) during one of his trips and since then they had been inseparable. Usually, Spike liked Anya but right now her voice was the last thing he wanted to hear was her voice. "Are you even listening to me William? Honestly.just wait until Rupert hears about this."  
  
"He's not going to do a bloody thing Anya.you know that." Spike mumbled leaning back. Anya sighed, shaking her head running her fingers through her hair.  
  
"William.don't start with me. Just because he's not here right now doesn't mean he hasn't been there for you. You really need to forgive him." Spike stood up, rolling his eyes.  
  
"The day I forgive that bastard Anya is the day you quite bloody naggin' me. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to bed." Beginning to walk out of the room he rubbed his eyes.  
  
"I don't think so Will. You have somewhere to be in one hour." Spike stopped, and turned towards Anya, confusion on his face.  
  
"What are you bloody talking about?" Anya crossed her arms, looking him in the eyes.  
  
"You have to get to church. We're going and you're not going to get out of it because you were stupid enough to go out drinking the other night." Spike groaned as he held his head in despair. Sighing he made his way up the stairs to his room. Instead of punishing himself by looking at the bed he immediately walked to his closet and grabbed his button down blue shirt. Walking to the bathroom he ran cold water onto his face, his silver necklace that he always wore hung down and as he looked up into the mirror seeing how shitty he actually looked he shook his head. Getting the shirt on he grabbed a pair of clean pants and slipping them on he made his way back down stairs. Sliding into the car he leaned his head against the door and closed his eyes. He fell asleep as Anya drove off and didn't even realize the thirty minute drive had passed until Anya smacked him on the side of the face lightly.  
  
"Wake up sleepy head." She said, grabbing her bag she took her keys out and got out of the car, adjusting her skirt. Spike rubbed the sleep out of his eyes once again looking out the window he squinted as the sunlight attacked his eyes. Slowly getting out he adjusted to the light and as he pulled down his shirt he looked towards the church entrance.  
  
"I see you've finally been able to make it.Spike." A small, feminine voice said behind him. Turning around he looked towards the familiar blonde head he had teased since his first day at his new high school.  
  
"Nice to see you too Summers.now what brings you here? I mean after all, its not every day that you get a Bible-hugging broad to talk to a low life like myself." Buffy Summers frowned. Sighing she looked up to Spike and tried a smile but it wouldn't come to her.  
  
"Bible-hugging? I'm afraid I'm not familiar with the term.but if you mean I do attend church every Sunday you're right Spike.I do." Spike smirked.  
  
"Course I'm right pet. But, then again.it's not that hard to see that you are a girl who goes to church.I mean with that sweater that you always wear and everything." Buffy took a deep breath in, trying to keep her composure.  
  
"You know Spike.God teaches us to have faith and to befriend our enemies. I'm just doing what God asks of me. You don't need to throw it back in my face."  
  
"I'm not throwing a bloody thing in anyone's face pet. Besides.God has nothing and wants nothing to do with me."  
  
"I think you're wrong Spike, and hopefully you'll soon realize it for yourself. Now if you'll excuse me." Spike watched as Buffy walked past him, holding her previous Bible and wearing that same stupid sweater she always did wear. Searching his pockets for his cigarettes he groaned as he remembered he had left them on his bed.along with his lighter.  
  
"Bloody 'ell." 


	2. Punishment or Regret?

Disclaimer: Again, I don't own anything. If only I did.*sighs* But for now I'll be happy with my pretty muse named Spike. *grins* He's exactly like me.only male and good looking! Anyways, getting off track. I've asked Joss if I could own them but he selfishly said no. (Actually, I never talked to Joss; if I did I'd praise him for the brilliance he thought of in that head of his.) But I do own one thing. The Plot. That's it.  
  
A/N: Awww you like me! Hehe, Well thanks for the reviews hopefully I'll get more soon. I didn't even think I'd get any. But to answer and thank those that did review:  
  
Chris: I really liked "A Walk to Remember" its sad you didn't but everyone has different tastes. You're right, I did say this isn't going to be like the movie and right now its sits on the fence. I got the basic bad boy falling for the good girl idea from the movie but that's about it. I appreciate the fact that you think it's a great idea and a good plot its things like that that encourage me to write more. So thanks ^_^  
  
Tinkerbell42: I'm glad you like what I've done so far. Thanks. I loved the movie too but like I said before its not going to be exactly like the movie because I don't think that it'd work completely. I hope you like the next chapter.  
  
IceBlueRose: YOU'D BETTER UPDATE MISSY! I've done it.you're turn! But yeah, we room together so there's no point to this.  
  
"Well, Mr. Giles, since this is your first offense I'm glad we've gotten you now before you could do anything worse. Because you were the individual that not only bought the beer, but you were the one that gave it to everyone else.you are the one getting in trouble. Do you understand me?" Judge Copeland asked. Spike sighed as Anya stood next to him in the juvenile court. He couldn't believe it! He was eighteen and they were all upset about a few cases of beer! Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted by Anya's jab into his arm. He cleared his throat.  
  
"Uh.yes sir. I do understand and I'm willing to accept any punishment that you see fit." The judge smiled and sat back in his chair.  
  
"Now that's what I want to hear Mr. Giles and I'm sure you'll agree that the punishment given to you is justified. So, starting as of three-o- clock this afternoon you are to help the Big Brothers, Big Sisters Foundation and you will become a big brother to a young man named Conner Johnson." Spike suppressed his groan as Judge Copeland continued, "You will also participate in the tutoring service your school has in helping the younger students in the middle schools around the city. Each week you will report to a Mrs. Joyce Summers, she's the one that runs both the places I'm sending you to; that is Big Brothers, Big Sisters as well as the tutoring, and she will report to me. Do you understand this Mr. Giles?"  
  
"Yeah, I bloody do." Spike mumbled.  
  
"What was that Mr. Giles?"  
  
"Uh, yes sir.I understand completely." Spike replied, forcing the smile on his face. A slow smile came to Judge Copeland's face and he quickly set down his pen and took off his glasses to look directly at Spike.  
  
"You know Mr. Giles, I see a lot of teenagers like yourself each and every day and sometimes I lose hope in them but you Mr. Giles, you've restored my faith in most teenagers. I think that if you can do a complete turn around then maybe just maybe, my job as judge is being fulfilled. Best of luck to you Mr. Giles.case dismissed." With that Judge Copeland lightly hit his gavel on the desk and as everyone stood up as he left Spike gave the window to the outside a last look as he sighed.  
  
"Goodbye life. 'Ello hell." He muttered, following closely behind Anya. Walking into the lobby Spike pulled out his cell phone, ready to call his friends and let them know what hell he was really in but before he could make the call, Anya took the cell away from him.  
  
"Your father and I have decided that you're not going to have your phone and until we decide on other things, you're not going to have your Jeep."  
  
"What are you talking about? I'm going to need it to get to these idiotic things that nancy boy of a judge sentenced me to!"  
  
"Well you're just going to have to get a ride from me, ride the bus, or you're going to have to get a ride from Angel and I mean Angel only."  
  
"You mean to tell me that none of my other friends can give me a ride?" Anya turned towards him, putting the phone in her purse.  
  
"That's exactly what I'm telling you William. You screwed up this time and I'm not going to be here to allow you to just use me to do you're punishment. You need to learn that you're not all that and for once you're going to treat me with the respect I deserve." Spike scowled.  
  
"Why should I? You're not my bloody Mum." He turned and began to storm off.  
  
"No Spike, you're right. I'm not. Your mom ran out on you and your father when you were barely one year old and since then your father has had to raise you." Spike stopped.  
  
"You're right Anya, she was a bitch of a Mum and guess what, I don't care."  
  
"Spike, look. When I met your father and then I met you. I fell in love with both of you. You were the son that I could never have, and I didn't just marry your father to make you're life miserable Spike.I married him to help you. Now, come on, we have just enough time for you to get something to eat and then I'll drop you off at the Big Brothers, Big Sisters complex where you'll meet with Mrs. Summers." Leave it to Anya to make him feel like shit.  
  
"Alright, fine. Let's just get this over with." Spike mumbled, climbing into Anya's car. Anya sighed as she climbed into the car. Glancing once more towards Spike she shook her head and put the key into the ignition. Slowly they pulled out of the Metropolitan Court House parking lot and as they slowly drove off, Spike gazed out the window and rolled his eyes as he passed by his friends who were piling out of their car and walking into the local pizza hang out. Angel had seen him and gave him a wave as they passed by. Spike merely raised his hand to say hello to them and he watched as Drusilla looked after Angel's gaze and stared after Spike. Suddenly Zach came up behind Dru, wrapped his arm around her and kissed her hard on the mouth. Spike sat up, glaring towards Zach who, after his kiss, grinned towards Spike and mouthed, 'Your loss'. Clenching his fist, Spike used all his control to keep from hitting something. As they got further from the hang out, Spike's fist loosened. Finally, they pulled into the driveway and before Anya could say a word, Spike was out of the car, slamming the door he walked up into the house and up to his room he collapsed on his bed.  
  
"This is bloody hell. I'm in hell."  
  
"Spike. Spike come on wake up." Anya shook him lightly, trying to get Spike to awaken from his deep sleep. Finally, a groan emerged from the bleached blonde young man.  
  
"Mum, its two-thirty, I plan on sleeping at least another four hours." He mumbled. Anya shook her head as she kneeled down to his eye level.  
  
"I don't think so Spike, you have Big Brothers and Sisters. Come on, up you go." Anya pulled the covers off of Spike as he clenched his eyes, trying to keep from having to get up. With a groan, he felt Anya moving to the other side of his bed and the next thing he knew, he was flat on his ass in the middle of his room. Looking around, he winced as he caught Anya in the way of the light, but some escaped around her small figure.  
  
"Damn it all to hell."  
  
"Don't be using that language in this house young man. Now, I suggest you get up and get showered because I'm not letting you miss your first day." Anya replied as she brushed her hands off and threw a towel towards a disgruntled, mumbling Spike. "Get up now." With that, Anya pushed the rest of the curtains open and Spike tried covering his eyes with his towel. Starting to lay back down he was suddenly pushed up.  
  
"What the mot-"  
  
"Yes, I'm your step mother. Now I'm going to be evil, get up!" Spike looked up towards Anya and swore inside. Slowly he got to his feet and scratching his head lightly with one hand, he rubbed his eyes with the other.  
  
"Fine, I'm getting up now. You bloody happy woman?"  
  
"Yes, I'm very happy. But I suggest that you get into that shower before I smack you across the head for even daring to try and call me woman. Now, get!" Spike grumbled under his breath and slowly made his way towards the shower. It wasn't until Anya gave him a swift kick in the butt that he moved quicker. Minutes later he emerged from the shower, a loose towel around his waist as the water dripped from his hair to his body and slowly slid down. Walking to his dresser he placed the silver necklace around his neck once more and with a soft kiss to it, he let it rest against his chest. Slowly he leaned down and smiled as he picked up familiar photo. There in front of him was a nine year old Spike with a nine year old Angel and their dads on their annual fishing trip. That annual trip had slowly disappeared as Rupert Giles had gotten richer and richer. He had gotten busier and busier every day. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months and months, made the years disappear. Tossing the photo to the side, Spike refused to show any emotion. Quickly he got dressed and headed downstairs.  
  
Buffy Summers sighed as she waited outside the school gymnasium. He was late. On his first day he was late. Her mom wouldn't care but she sure did. How dare he leave these kids waiting! It was his fault he had to do this. The least he could've done was been on time. Crossing her arms she paced back and forth slowly. It annoyed her. She couldn't tell exactly what about Spike Giles bothered him but it did. Maybe it was his platinum blonde hair. There was no way that was a normal hair color! Or maybe it was because he treated her faith like a big joke. Yes. That had to be it. Having grown up with parents who were devoted to their religion, Buffy never really wanted to be anything more than a part of that. Maybe that was why Spike, what a silly nickname, but maybe that was why he annoyed her. Sighing, she knew that she should try and accept him for who he was but she wanted so badly to change him. Hopefully she'd be able to grab a hold of the real him inside. Then she'd definitely be able to rea-  
  
"Buffy? Hello? Earth to Buffy?" A hand waved in front of her. As Buffy shook the thoughts from her head, she turned to meet the emerald green gaze of her best friend Willow Rosenberg. A smile immediately appeared on Buffy's face.  
  
"Oh sorry Willow, I was just thinking. You know me, I start thinking and I go off."  
  
"Yeah, you go off to your lala-everything is wonderful-land. It's a wonder I can even get through to you now-a-days!" Willow slowly smiled and hooking arms with Buffy she began to start pacing with her. "Now, tell Willow whats wrong."  
  
"Nothings wrong." Willow turned to Buffy and looked skeptic. "Honest. Nothing. I promise, nothing wrong in Buffy-land."  
  
"All right. But only if you're completely sure that you're okay."  
  
"I'm fine. I'm just, annoyed okay?" Willow's brow furrowed.  
  
"Annoyed? At who?"  
  
"Spike." Buffy said, with a matter-of-fact answer. Willow looked confused so Buffy continued, "First of all, on Sunday he called be bible- hugging! What's that supposed to mean? And then to top it off he got himself in trouble on the night of homecoming so for the next, I'm going to say months, I have to help him out so he can get used to being a 'Big Brother'." Willow's eyes widened.  
  
"Oh. So you're afraid you're going to tell him how you feel?" Buffy's gaze snapped up towards Willow.  
  
"What do you mean how I feel?"  
  
"Well, I mean. I-I was just trying to." Willow stopped. "Oh look, there's Spike now!" Buffy turned around to see the blonde getting out of Anya's car. Anya said something to him and Spike nodded. Slamming the door shut he waited until Anya drove off before he started walking up towards Buffy and Willow. As he stepped onto the curb he put out the cigarette he had been smoking and crushing it under his foot he looked towards Buffy.  
  
" 'Ello pet. Are we just going to stand here or get on with this?"  
  
"You know, you don't have to be that pessimistic." Buffy replied as she adjusted her shirt, trying to keep her eyes from meeting Spike's bright blues.  
  
"Why not be? I mean, if I'm going to have to help out some pathetic kid when I have nothing better to do why not have a shitty attitude about it?" Buffy frowned.  
  
"I'll have you know Conner isn't some pathetic kid. He's, he's someone that needs someone to show they actually care for him. But apparently you're not capable of that at all. So, since you have no real motivation to actually HELP him, why don't you just leave?"  
  
"Can't do that. Besides, it's not like this kid really needs anyone. He can grow up just fine by himself."  
  
"That's the point Spike. He is alone, he's by himself. If you had taken the time to actually ask about Conner then you would've known that his parents were killed. You try dealing with that by yourself and come out of it normal. Or what you consider normal." Buffy turned to walk away but was shortly cut off as Spike grabbed a hold of her arm. Buffy glared towards him, anger behind her eyes. When she looked around for help, she noticed that Willow had conveniently disappeared. Buffy had no choice but to deal with Spike by herself.  
  
"What? You want to ridicule me now for my so called Bible-hugging ways?" She hissed. Spike sighed and looked down. Letting her go he immediately took back saying those words. Putting his hands in his back pockets he slowly looked back up towards her.  
  
"How can I help?" 


	3. Change Of Heart?

Disclaimer: If I owned ANYTHING, I'd be in Ireland. I'm not so 'nuff said.  
  
A/N: Okay, first off I'm going to answer somethings I got in a couple reviews. I'm not trying to push anything on anyone. The reason I have Buffy as a religious girl and religion is being brought up is that's how its working out in my head. I haven't mentioned a specific religion because I believe I'm the last person to push religion on ANYONE. I was pushed to be Catholic and now I barely go to church. Secondly, I'm basing this as Spike is in Sunnydale where its illegal to drink at 18. I'm not trying to offend anyone, honestly that was my last intention. I assumed everyone understood this story was in at least Sunnydale, bad on my part. Lastly, this story isn't going to be the "bad boy turning good" and I don't really like that stereotype. Its basically a "Bad boy redefining what's important while introducing the good girl to other aspects of life" Like I said in the beginning, the basic idea came from "A Walk To Remember" the plot is mine. As for the whole "Giles" last name thing. It's something I decided I wanted because I happen to like the whole "Giles/Spike father son gag" Besides that ASH may not be old enough but for this he is. That's why I stated it was an AU. I'm sorry if some people don't like that but that's what I'm using for this. Okay besides that I hope ya'll like this chapter. I imagine there will be questions on Spike and Conner's relationship and why its going where it is but I'll answer them later as I write more. Sorry this took so long college is kicking my booty and I just joined a sorority with my best friend so yeah, I'm busy. Enjoy and please don't forget that nifty little purple review button before you leave! Thanks!!!  
  
************************* "You can start by trying to care for once. I know that's not something you're used to but.at least try." Buffy replied after a few moments. Spike nodded as Buffy turned around and walked towards the door. Putting her hand on the handle, she turned to Spike one last time. "I want you to promise me something."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I want you to promise me that once you meet Conner, if you don't plan on staying, don't tell him things that you can't make come true. Because if you do, I'm going to have to do something I've never done."  
  
"And that is?"  
  
"Hate you." Spike was slightly taken aback.  
  
"Hate me? You couldn't hate me. It's not within your nature Buffy." Buffy nodded and took her hand off the handle as she walked up closer towards him.  
  
"You're right, I couldn't hate you. But then again I've never had to. I could really dislike you and that would be a huge problem because I don't dislike people either but I promise you one thing. If you do anything to hurt him I will."  
  
"You're dead set on making sure I help this kid aren't you?"  
  
"Yes I am."  
  
"Well then pet, lets get the show on the road then." Spike went to walk towards the door but Buffy reached a hand up and stopped Spike from walking much further as she put it against his arm. He looked down towards her, "What's this all about? I thought you wanted me to help luv."  
  
"I do. But Spike, don't call me pet or luv. I know you don't like me, don't pretend like you do." Buffy turned and walked towards the door and opening it she walked in. Spike rolled his eyes and followed shortly after her. As he walked in he was suddenly attacked with the sounds of shouting, crying and complaining kids. Shaking his head he took a few seconds before getting fully adjusted to the sound. That's when; just as he turned he met the same blue eyes that he had only just looking into moments before, except these were older.  
  
"Hello William, wonderful to see you here. Now I know that you're not here willingly but I'm sure you're willing to work hard, right?" Joyce Summers said.  
  
"Uh, yeah. Sure thing."  
  
"William? Are you feeling alright?" Joyce seemed suddenly concerned. Spike nodded. He was still trying to get used to the sudden name change. Only his father ever called him William, even Anya called him Spike for Christ's sake. What was it with stuffy older people insisting on using a name you hated? Shrugging it off he looked up towards Joyce and gave her a half smile.  
  
"Yes Mrs. Summers I'm perfectly fine. Just getting adjusted from the drastic change from sunlight to, uh, gym light. Yeah, that's it." He waiting until Joyce smiled and laughed softly.  
  
"Oh you're just the sweetest thing. It really is a shame about the circumstances that got you here, but that's in the past and I'm not here to judge. I'm just glad you're here; we could use all the help you can give William. Now, if you'll follow me, I'll introduce you to Conner." Spike looked around quickly, wondering which runt would be the one he'd have to deal with, or as Buffy put it, which was the runt he'd have to get to know and help.  
  
"Uh, Mrs. Summers, where's Buffy?"  
  
"Oh, she's helping fix the snacks for the kids who are here camp. But she'll be around later. I'm sure you'll get to see here."  
  
"Um, that's not why I was as-" Spike shut up and decided to quite while he was ahead, "Just lead the way Mrs. Summers."  
  
"Of course! Follow me then." Spike slowly followed behind Joyce as she weaved in between games, activities, singing, plays and who knows what else. It wasn't until they reached the far end of the gym that Spike actually looked up from the ground. There weren't anymore little kids running around so it was safe to look up. As he looked in front of him he saw a scrawny teenage kid who was sitting in the corner reading a book. The kid's jeans were torn at the knees and were badly torn up at the bottom. His black shirt was holy and his hair was long enough to shade his eyes and overlap his ears. The teenager didn't look a day over sixteen but maybe he was way off. As Joyce walked up towards him she sat down in front of him and Spike held a groan in as she motioned him over. He walked over just in time to hear the tail-end of what she was telling him.  
" So Conner, this is William and he's going to be your new big brother. I do hope the two of you can get along." Spike looked down towards the teenager who momentarily looked up from his book and glared into Spike.  
  
"You expect that dork to actually be a big brother to me?" He asked. Spike immediately went on the defensive.  
  
"Hey now, I'm not a dork."  
  
"Could've fooled me." The teenager argued. Spike's brow furrowed.  
  
"Now Conner, you promised to actually try this time. So please, just give Spike a chance." Joyce said softly. She stood up and walked towards Spike, "Just give him a couple days; he'll learn to love you." With that she walked away leaving a very confused Spike with a really snotty, unwilling kid. Spike let out a deep sigh and rubbed his sweaty palms against his pant legs and walking over towards the mats that Conner sat on, he put on leg up on them and looked down to him.  
  
"Look mate, it's obvious neither of us wants to go through this but it's something we have to try out alright?"  
  
"Why should I care about what you're saying to me? It's obvious you're just some stupid idiot who screwed up and got caught and now is serving time." Spike tried thinking of a witty comeback but shut his mouth. He was ready to give up on this kid. Then Buffy walked in with a tray and met his eyes. With a groan he rolled his eyes and sat down.  
  
"Alright, you got me. I'm someone who really doesn't want to be here and the only reason I am is because I got caught. You're right. But just because I'm here now doesn't mean that we can't make the best of the situation you got that?"  
  
"Yeah, I got it." Conner never looked up from his book, "But you might as well quit while you're ahead. I know your type. You'll be here until your term is up and then you'll leave." Spike couldn't believe what a shitty attitude this kid actually had.  
  
"Hey, listen up mate. You're bloody right I'll leave if you keep treating me like you are now. If you'd actually take into some consideration my feelings then maybe I'd actually like to stay around when my sentence is over." Conner scoffed.  
  
"Please, there's no use convincing me. There's nothing that's going to keep you here. It's already been planned out. You'll leave then some other stupid idiotic dumbass will come along and take your place. I'm sick of it and I'm not going through it." Spike was getting annoyed, and where on earth did this kid come from? Planet Huge Stick Up His Arse?  
  
"You know what, with language like that an-and an outlook on the situation that way no wonder people have left you behind before. Well, you listen up you little...punk. Spike Giles isn't a stupid idiotic dumbass. Not only will I prove to you that I want to help you out but I will stay. I'll stay for as long as you're here." Conner looked up towards him and Spike actually saw a glimmer of hope in the teenage boys eyes.  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Bloody right!" It took an awkward moment of silence but then Conner shut the book and scooted up towards him, letting his legs dangle down.  
  
"I thought Mrs. Summers said your name was William."  
  
"It is, but my nickname is Spike. You can call me whichever you want."  
  
"I like Spike, it sounds cool."  
  
"I know mate, hence the fact it's my nickname."  
  
"Can I have a nickname?"  
  
"Maybe."  
  
"How do you get a nickname?"  
  
"I don't know mate, we'll see if we can figure one out for you."  
  
"Why do you talk so damn weird?"  
  
"Because, I'm from England. Now, there'll be no more of that language coming from you."  
  
"You used it."  
  
"I bloody well did not." Spike stopped and looked down towards Conner who eyed him skeptically. "Alright fine, I did, but Mrs. Summers would die if she heard you talkin' like me. So anytime we're around her or any other adults its well-mannered speaking. Got it?"  
  
"Got it."  
  
"Alright then. We're going to do all right kid."  
  
"Hey Spike?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Why are you doing this?" Spike looked down towards the ground and picked at his fingernails. Looking up he looked towards Buffy who was in the middle of helping some little kid with glue.  
  
"Lets just say, I might be having a change of heart about a few things." 


	4. Using You

Disclaimer: Oh how I wish I owned Spike -sigh- Honestly, why can't a girl be that lucky? As always, I don't own squat.  
  
A/N: Alright, I hope this is a good chapter I'm not too sure about it myself but hey, what else is new? Lets see, I hope everyone gets what I'm doing and the plot has changed a little but I'm not going to give away anything because that ruins the fun in things. So enjoy and hit the nifty review button please.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Buffy sighed as she walked into her room. It was almost midnight and she was dead tired but she still had so much she had to do. So much she wanted to see. But it was so late. With a determined sigh, Buffy shook her head and rubbed at the base of her neck. Grabbing her bag by the side of her bed she opened her window and carefully put it down outside on the roof. Slowly she made her way out of the room and closed the window till it was only a crack open. Putting the bag across her shoulder Buffy made her way down the tree. Hopping down she wiped her hands off and smiled as she looked inside to see her parents reading in their study. They always did that sort of thing. Quietly she walked down the driveway and down the street towards the cemeteries. Opening the gate to the cemetery she sighed as she let it close quietly behind her. Normally people came around but tonight it seemed unusually quiet. Shrugging it off she carefully stepped around the tombstones into a clearing. With a smile she put her bag down and pulled out a blanket. Two of them. Putting one down she wrapped the other one around her and looked up towards the stars. A smile planted on her face as she gazed up towards the twinkling lights above her. They seemed so far away yet so close. Hearing a rustle in the trees Buffy looked around. She grabbed ahold of her flashlight and looked around, seeing nothing. Suddenly, she was grabbed from behind.  
  
"Gotcha!" Buffy screamed out as Spike laughed as he pulled away. It wasn't until he saw the pure look of terror on his face that he really felt bad and just stopped laughing. "Whoa now, calm down. It's alright, Buffy, it's just me. It's just me." Spike sank to his knees beside her as she began to slowly regain a normal breathing pattern.  
  
"Don't. Ever. Do. That. Again." She said, breathing with each pause. Spike nodded,  
  
"Alright, alright, no need to freak out on me luv, now just breathe. Slowly. That's it. One after another. That's right, take it slow."  
  
"Don't patronize me!" Buffy exclaimed.  
  
"I'm not! Just calm down! Bloody hell!" Spike yelled as Buffy went to hit him when he tried to wrap an arm around her. "What the hell is wrong with you bloody women? You fly off the handle at the tiniest thing. Now I definitely know why I'm never getting married!" Spike said. Buffy turned and looked towards him.  
  
"What are you doing here?"  
  
"Oh! Now you're up for civil conversation! Well you can forget it missy! I try and help you out and you lung at me? Lord! And they thought Drusilla was crazy! Let me tell you something, at least she could understand a practical joke!" Spike leaned on a tombstone and rolled his eyes. Taking a pack of cigarettes out he took one out and put it in his mouth, letting it drape down while he patted at his pockets to find his lighter. Buffy frowned when he lit it.  
  
"You know, those things are going to kill you."  
  
"Yeah well I figure we've all gotta go some time. Why not make the best of it eh?" Spike smirked as he took a long drag of his cigarette. Slowly he exhaled and looked towards Buffy who didn't seem in her normal happy mood. He sighed, "Look, luv. No hard feelings eh? I just saw you out here and it's past midnight and I just couldn't let the moment pass up." Buffy scoffed and looked towards him.  
  
"You know that's just something I'd expect from you because you can be so, so, well I can't think of a word but I know you're that."  
  
"Well you could obviously go with charming, unbelievably sexy or even my personal favorite, absolutely perfect." Buffy smiled and shook her head.  
  
"Nobody's perfect Spike."  
  
"Oh really? You seem to think might high of yourself then. Because the way I see it," he took another drag, "You think you're better than everyone. So please, spare the lecture and give it to someone who actually cares." Spike said. Buffy sighed and shook her head.  
  
"I'll never get you Spike. But," She smiled, "Number three is done." Spike's eyebrow rose.  
  
"Number three of what?" He asked.  
  
"My list of things I want to do before I die. Number three is befriending someone you normally wouldn't. I mean normally I wouldn't be friends with you but, I'm definitely going to try."  
  
"Oh so now I'm just something on your stupid list? Great Buffy, thanks. Because you know it's my life ambition to befriend someone who only becomes a friend with you because of a list." Spike spat back.  
  
"Spike, that's not what I meant." He crushed the cigarette.  
  
"Yeah sure luv, look, do me a favor and save it. What the hell are you doing out here anyway?" Buffy sighed and smiled slowly, shaking her head she looked up towards the stars.  
  
"Dreaming."  
  
"Dreaming? Of what?"  
  
"Of what's out there. I mean its not every night that you can look up and actually see all the wonders that have been created. It makes you think you can do anything. And you know you can. Look at them Spike, all the stars, they're high up there and yet so reachable."  
  
"Luv, you can't reach the stars."  
  
"That's what you think." Buffy replied. She smirked and stood up, the blanket still wrapped around her petite body. "I'm going to touch the stars and I'm going to make them soar, you'll see." Looking towards him she took the blanket from around her shoulders and handed it to him, "You need this more than I do. Just return it till you figure out that you can reach the stars."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Spike groaned. He had his Algebra class in less than fifteen minutes and his homework was sitting on his desk at home. There was no way he was going to be able to turn it in late. Rounding the corner he began thinking of excuses on why he'd miss class that day. With a roll of his eyes he figured he couldn't think of one. 'Face up to what you didn't do.you blockhead.' Spike thought. Turning in the direction of his class he didn't see the familiar blonde head he'd seen the night before. Running into Buffy, her head collided with his chin.  
  
"Ow." Buffy groaned, rubbing her head. Spike looked down to see Buffy, a sudden pain hit him in the chin.  
  
"Bleedin' Christ Summers! Next time watch where you're going!" Spike exclaimed. Buffy sighed, and nodded.  
  
"Yeah I know, I have a habit of looking at my feet when I walk. But I hope you can forgive me. I'm sorry Spike." She replied softly. Spike looked down towards Buffy once more and the anger he held slowly disappeared. How could he not forgive her? Cursing inside Spike shook his head.  
  
"Nah, look, it's my fault luv. I was just pissed off cuz I forgot my algebra homework and its on my desk. I shouldn't be taking out anger on you." Buffy looked surprised.  
  
"Wow, didn't think you had it in you."  
  
"Yeah well there's a lot of things you don't know about me pet. A lot of things. Besides that, you never even hung out with me before so technically you don't even know me." Buffy smiled and shook her head.  
  
"Quite the contrary Spike. I know you very well. You're William Giles, also known as Spike. You hang out with the likes of Angel O'Riley, Zach Montoya and Michael Jacobs. You had a girlfriend, though I haven't seen much of Drusilla and you don't eat lunch in the cafeteria because that is where all the rejects sit anyway." Spike smirked, then slowly began to laugh. Shaking his head he looked towards Buffy and adjusted his messenger bag on his shoulder.  
  
"Well now, aren't you the observant one. I guess then I could say the same about you. I do know you quite well." Spike said, before Buffy could interrupt him he began, "You're Elizabeth Summers, also known as Buffy. You have exactly one friend maybe two from what I've seen at school anyway and that's little Willow Rosenburg. You attend church every Sunday and you're mom helps out with the little kids that have no one, which I must say is a good idea. Now, you're always taking things into the religious perspective and there hasn't been a time I have seen you cuss or even mention anything bad, not to say you couldn't.plus I haven't even seen you be a 'bad' girl so to speak, but then again.not to say you couldn't." Spike smirked seeing Buffy flustered was one thing he definitely wanted to see more of, "Am I getting warm luv?" Buffy swallowed and looked up towards Spike. This was exactly what she didn't want. She didn't want to be cornered but Spike was just so, so, unbelievably gorgeous. Why did he have to look to handsome all the time? And what was with that smirk. Did he actually have to walk around acting as if he was the top of the food chain? Well, he was, in a sense. Buffy shook her head. Concentrate. "Penny for your thoughts luv?" Spike said, interrupting her thoughts.  
  
"Uh, um, we'd better get to Algebra." She quickly said. 'Better get to algebra? Stupid Buffy. Really stupid.' She thought. Spike looked at his watch.  
  
"Guess you're right. But don't think we won't finish this conversation later." He laughed as he started walking with her towards the class. There was something about Buffy that interested him. He wanted to learn more from her, yet be the only one to teach her things. Shrugging Spike blew it off. There'd be time enough for that. Right now though, he had to deal with the devil. His algebra teacher.  
  
"Now, when X equals Y plus six multiplied by two you simply take this equation and plug it in. You all should've done this on your homework so if you'll be so kind and turn that in." Mrs. Grey said in a high-pitched tone. Groans came from the classroom and Mrs. Grey grinned, she loved it when students were unprepared. Especially that bleached blonde kid in the back. What was his name? Oh yes, Willi-  
  
"Mrs. Grey?" Buffy said softly as she raised her hand. "Mrs. Grey?"  
  
"Yes Buffy?" Mrs. Grey replied as she smirked evilly towards those who were unprepared. Buffy Summers was the only one who ever came to class prepared and she adored the girl, simply adored her. There was nothing she wouldn't do for he-  
  
"I forgot my homework Mrs. Grey. Well, in actuality, I didn't understand it so I was hoping I could ask you for a days extension." Buffy had never seen her teacher's eyes widen that much. Mrs. Grey looked as if she was about to have a heart attack. The young blonde woman got up from her seat and helped her teacher to her chair.  
  
"You. You forgot your homework Miss Summers?"  
  
"Yes Ma'am. I'm really sorry about this. I-I just, I didn't understand the material. I will understand if you don't want to give the extension but I just felt that since even I didn't understand the material that maybe you'd allow the class a day?" Buffy asked. She held her breath. What was she doing? Why was she suddenly lying? She knew damn well her homework was in her folder! That's when Buffy looked up towards the back of the class. Towards the familiar blue gaze of the person she had just befriended a couple days before. They were wide with shock.  
  
"Of course Buffy, class can have a day extension we'll go over the material tomorrow. Be sure to read the pages of the chapter.  
  
"Thank you Mrs. Grey." Buffy returned to her seat and refused to look back towards the back of the classroom. If she had, she would've seen a very grateful smile and she would've seen something in the blue gaze that would've scared her. The second class ended Buffy gathered her books and began walking out of the classroom. She was almost out the door when a strong hand clamped onto her arm. Turning around she saw Spike and almost let out a small laugh but she stopped herself from doing so.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Why what?"  
  
"Why did you do that Buffy? Why'd you lie?"  
  
"I didn't lie. What makes you think I lied?" Spike raised the stapled pieces of paper. Buffy could've cursed out but didn't. It was her homework; it must've fallen out of her binder when she was walking so fast. She sighed. "Alright, so I lied. What about it?"  
  
"Why did you do it Buffy? You had your homework done. Why'd you lie and get a day extension for everyone?"  
  
"Because I wanted to alright? I felt that you deserved a break for once. God Spike, I- I just wanted you to know that I would be there for you I guess."  
  
"But why lie? There was no reason to lie at all."  
  
"Yes there was. I mean you had your homework at home and well, for once I figured that everyone needed a break from Mrs. Grey. She can be really mean." Spike slowly smiled and shook his head.  
  
"That she can. But the thing is Buffy, you're better than that. You're way better than that."  
  
"Look, why can't I just have one time where I want to do something that I feel it right? Huh Spike? Why can't I just do something that I want?" Spike looked down and shook his head and looked back up to her while he pushed her into the other hall.  
  
"Why? Because Buffy. People will start using you. People will start wanting you to lie for them about other things. They'll start wanting you to.to." Spike slowly stopped as he ran his fingers down Buffy's face lightly and as they inched closer together. Their lips met and their arms encircled one another. 


	5. Pool, Movies and Shoes

Disclaimer: Oh if only I owed Spike. Then he and I could go to a far off land and have lots of.well.lets just leave it at that. I don't own squat cept for the nice plot that the characters play out.  
  
A/N: Alright! Well, I'm happy with this chapter. I found it awesome to write and I hope ya'll love it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Please don't stop reviewing (I think I might've lost some of you but I hope you come back!) I love all the feedback and usually it makes me write a lot faster and a lot more. So please don't forget the nifty review button at the bottom. Thanks!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Buffy felt the warmth grow within her body. She felt like she knew this is what she wanted, this is who she wanted. Slowly, as their lips came apart and they regained control of their breath, Buffy looked up towards the now sapphire gaze of.of Spike? Buffy jumped back away from Spike's arms as if she had just seen a ghost. She turned pale. Shaking her head she slowly backed up towards the wall and brought her hand up to her lips. She hadn't. No she couldn't have. She hadn't kissed him back. She couldn't have kissed him back.  
  
"No." She said softly.  
  
"Buffy? Buffy, luv, are you okay?" Spike asked as he slowly walked up closer towards her. Buffy shook her head and tried moving away but being against the wall she really had no place to go.  
  
"No, this didn't just happen." Spike took in a deep breath. Cursing inside he managed to keep back from yelling out. He decided to just help her as best as he could.  
  
"Buffy, it did happen. But listen.listen to me Buffy." He said softly, taking ahold of her chin he forced her to look at him. "Buffy, you just say the word, and never again." She looked at him, confusion in her eyes.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You just say the word and what just happened here, because it did happen, will never happen again. I promise." Buffy took a second before she let everything register. Looking towards Spike she forced herself to look into his eyes. She knew it had just been a kiss.nothing more. But what she felt inside was.was something much more than just a simple kiss. Looking past his 'tough-guy' image she slowly nodded.  
  
"Alright."  
  
"Alright what?" Spike replied.  
  
"Alright, I'll say it." When Spike looked at her, obviously needing for her to continue she looked away and then looked back, "I don't want that to happen again." Spike felt his stomach drop. If that was possible. For some reason that one kiss had, had shaken him up and now to hear Buffy say that she never wanted a repeat of it. He nodded, he had to. In order to keep her friendship he had to agree to what she wanted.  
  
"Alright, I'll do my best to see that it doesn't." Spike moved away from her, no longer keeping her pinned towards the wall. Looking down he dug his hands into his pockets, "But Buffy, just so you know luv." Buffy moved closer towards him, looking back up towards her he slowly smirked, "It wasn't that good anyway."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"It wasn't that good anyway?" Angel O'Riley said as he chalked up his pool stick. Looking down towards the platinum blonde head that was focusing on the cue ball going for the break he shook his head. "Are you crazy? You never say that do a girl! Ever!" After breaking the rack and getting a solid in Spike went for another shot.  
  
"Gimme a break mate. It was the last thing I could come up with. Besides," He paused as he took the shot, and winced as he missed, "It wasn't that great." Angel raised an eyebrow and looked towards Spike with disbelief.  
  
"You mean to tell me you actually got little Miss-I-Go-To-Church-And-I'm-A- Good-Girl all pinned against the wall and you got her kissing and it wasn't that great?" He asked.  
  
"Yeah, I did." Spike stopped, "Well actually, we kissed and then she backed up against the wall after we kissed. So technically, I didn't get her up against the wall." Angel shook his head.  
  
"Same thing man! Honestly, you have a goodie-good. Don't you feel that a bit of.corruption is the best solution?" Angel smirked at the thought. A girl to teach exactly what you wanted out of everything, shaking his head he knew it wasn't right but a guy could dream. When Spike shot his next ball into the pocket he looked up towards Angel and glared.  
  
"I hear you talk about her like that again and I'll kick your ass from here all the back to bloody England." Angel's eyes widened. Something was wrong. No. Something was weird.  
  
"Uh, alright. Spike, let me ask you something." He leaned down and looked towards Spike who was setting up his next shot, "Did you by chance.cop a feel?"  
  
"What the bloody hell are you talking about?" Spike exclaimed as he missed the cue ball entirely. Angel smiled and laughed softly.  
  
"Just asking you a question man. Did you cop a feel?" Spike gripped the pool stick tightly.  
  
"No I bloody well did not! Now if you don't mind I'd like to finish this damn game." Angel nodded and continued to laugh. He watched as Spike became more and more frustrated and shook his head.  
  
"You've got it bad man." Spike missed the ball again. Standing up he glared towards Angel and dropped the stick on the ground.  
  
"What the hell do you mean I 'got it bad'. You trying to imply something mate?" Spike said, walking closer towards Angel who was still laughed, except louder this time.  
  
"Oh hell no, I'm not implying, I'm telling you Spike. You've got it bad towards, what's her name again? Oh yeah, Buffy."  
  
"Listen up mate. I don't have anything towards the soddin' blonde. You got that?"  
  
"Yep, got it Spike." Spike nodded. He was satisfied with what had just been agreed upon but as he lined up for his next shot he couldn't help but hear Angel sneaking a laugh from behind. Just as he turned around through, he didn't see Angel. All he saw was a huge fist connecting with his face.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Xander Harris stood above the now fallen Spike, fist still clenched. As Spike slowly got up, Xander backed away a little, fist still clenched. Spike touched his lip where it had been split open and as he removed his hand he saw the blood. Looking towards Xander he saw nothing but hatred in his eyes. Spike went to walk towards him but Xander backed up again. As Spike went to talk Xander held up his fist again.  
  
"No! Shut up!" He paused, "Now I know you're probably going to kick my ass but, after spending time with a crying Buffy I had the strong urge to hit you. So, now you can hit me just remember.I bleed easily." Xander lowered his hand and closed his eyes. Spike sighed and looked around the room.  
  
"C'mon mate, lets take this outside." Xander opened his eyes.  
  
"Huh?" Spike rolled his eyes and then looked towards Xander as he grabbed his arm.  
  
"You. Me. Outside. Do I need to explain it to you again?"  
  
"No, no, I understood the first time." As Spike and Xander started walking out of the pool hall Xander looked towards Spike confused, "Why aren't you hitting me again?"  
  
"Because."  
  
"Because why?"  
  
"Because if I do I'm going have bloody well wasted my time. Besides that factor there's a lady you've been talking to on the phone and I'm wanting to know what was said." Xander's brow furrowed.  
  
"So let me get this straight, you're not beating me up because you want information on Buffy?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"And if I don't talk to you about Buffy, then what?"  
  
"Then I'm going to beat you to a bloody pulp now just start talking about Buffy. I don't have all night to just stand here and listen to you while you try and figure things out. Now what did Buffy call you about because it obviously involved me so I have a right to know." Xander stood there. Crossing his arms he looked towards Spike.  
  
"Wow. You've got it bad for her." Spike clenched his hands together. There was that damn word again.  
  
"What is it with you people? I don't have it bad for anyone! Bloody hell! You make it seem like I'm in love with the broad!"  
  
"Are you?"  
  
"Are you crazy?"  
  
"Could be. Now are you in love with Buffy?"  
  
"Of course not! I barely know the girl!" Xander laughed softly.  
  
"Oh god, you're so in love with her."  
  
"You're nuts you know that mate? You're bloomin' crazy. How could you possibly think that I'm in love with Buffy Summers? You're out of your mind!" Xander laughed more, so much that he had to lean against the wall. Just as he did, Angel walked out to make sure everything was fine. Looking at Xander he raised an eyebrow.  
  
"What's going on?"  
  
"That idiot thinks that I'm in love with Buffy!" Angel grinned and nodded, looking towards Xander he leaned in.  
  
"You think so to?" Both began cracking up laughing and depended on the wall and each other for support to keep from falling. Spike on the other hand continued to clench his fists to keep from hitting either one of them. Turning away he walked further away shaking his head.  
  
"Dumbasses, thinking I'm in love with Buffy.ha."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"You don't really think that do you Willow?" Buffy said, sitting on the bed she pulled her pillow across her lap and took a handful of popcorn.  
"Think what?"  
"That, well that Spike meant what he said."  
  
"I don't know Buffy. I mean I'm sure he wanted to kiss you. That's like well a given but I mean, him saying that it wasn't that good. He's been known to be with a lot of girls Buffy."  
  
"So you're saying he did mean it." Willow's eyes widened and she quickly tried explaining.  
  
"No! No of course not! I don't mean that at all. I just meant that, well maybe he thought kissing you would've been better, more special. Because you know, you've, well, you've never." Willow trailed off, "I'm not explaining this very well am I?" Buffy shook her head as she pushed tears back. "Oh god, no Buffy, don't cry. Please don't cry."  
  
"I can't help it Willow. I mean, am I not kissable?"  
  
"Of course not Buffy, you're very kissable." Willow stopped, realizing what she said, "Not that I would know in anyway! I mean, I guess you are kissable. I can't really answer that one for you Buffy. Only you can."  
  
"Well I guess I'm kissable. I mean, who wouldn't want to kiss me right?"  
  
"Right! I mean, well I wouldn't but then again I'm a girl so that just makes this conversation completely wrong but, you know what I mean right?" Buffy nodded. "Good, now let's watch this movie and then get to bed. We have important things to do tomorrow."  
  
"Right." Buffy wiped at her tears. "Right, very important things to do." After a few moments Buffy smiled and looked towards Willow, "Hey Will?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"What color shoes should I get?" 


	6. Friendly Advice

Disclaimer: Again, nothing.-sighs- if only I did.then the world would be wonderful. Not that it isn't.hehe  
  
A/N: Alright. Here's an update. I know I've been slacking but with the holidays coming up.it's crazy. I hope you enjoy and please please hit the nice review button on the bottom.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Buffy frowned. Sitting down on the couch in front of the TV she looked around for the remote. Not finding it anywhere she rolled her eyes and looked under the couch. It wasn't there. With a determined look on her face she searched the room for it. Finally, after tearing the couch apart, looking in every crack she could think of, Buffy still hadn't found the remote.  
  
"Dawn!" She yelled at the top of her lungs.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Get your cute butt down here and find the remote!"  
  
"You look for it!"  
  
"I did, and I can't find it anywhere."  
  
"So that's my problem because?" Buffy crossed her arms and let out a deep breath. Sisters. They were such pains.  
  
"Because you were the last one in here." Buffy retorted. Buffy heard a door slam and moments later she heard the heavy footsteps slamming down onto the steps. With an annoyed look on her face, Dawn Summers walked into the living room holding her brown hair up with one hand. With a pony tail in her mouth she walked to the side of the fire place and took the remote down. Walking back to Buffy she shoved it in her hand.  
  
"Happy now?" Dawn said. Buffy grinned.  
  
"Yes, and thank you."  
  
"Whatever." Dawn started back up the stairs.  
  
"Hey Dawn."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I love you."  
  
"Yeah, yeah, I love you too." Dawn replied as she slammed her door. With a satisfied look on her face Buffy sat back down and pulled her blanket across her legs. Clicking the remote on, she smiled as her favorite movie came on.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Hey Spike?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"I-I kinda wanted to ask you something."  
  
"Shoot." Spike replied as he lined up his shot and tossed the basketball up. He grinned as it sunk through the net without touching anything.  
  
"I-I.well I wanted to know how you asked Drusilla out." Spike stopped and looked towards Conner.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I wanted to know how you asked Drusilla out."  
  
"No, I understand that. But why do you want to know how I asked Drusilla out?" Holding the ball at his hip, Spike looked towards Conner who, in the few weeks Spike had known him, had gone through a sudden growth spurt and was now almost as tall as him.  
  
"Well, I don't want to know like, Drusilla specifically, I just wanted to know.howyouaskagirlout." He mumbled. Spike raised an eyebrow.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Howdoyouaskagirlout?"  
  
"Huh?" Conner let out a frustrated sigh.  
  
"How do you ask a girl out?" He exclaimed. Spike grinned.  
  
"I knew what you were saying all along mate, just wanted to hear you say it loud." Conner frowned and glared towards Spike. He grabbed the ball as Spike went for the rebound. Spike slowly grinned and nodded, "Alright, I give. Now why do you want to know?"  
  
"Well, there's this girl."  
  
"Obviously mate, what's her name?"  
  
"Dawn."  
  
"Uh-huh, Dawn.?" Spike inquired. Conner shook his head.  
  
"I don't want to tell you. There's got to be a little mystery to this thing. Right?" Spike looked towards Conner and just shook his head.  
  
"Okay, so Dawn, no last name, has caught your interest. Why do you want to ask her out?" Spike smirked as he grabbed the rebound from Conner's shot. He began dribbling, waiting for Conner's response.  
  
"Isn't that obvious?"  
  
"Not really, maybe if you'd be so kind as to.tell me. I could let you know." Conner sighed and ran his fingers through his shaggy brown hair. He took a deep breath in.  
  
"First off, she's beautiful. I mean not just like, looks wise, of course she's beautiful there but her personality. It's like; she doesn't care what anyone thinks of her. She has her beliefs and her standards and she won't let anyone change that." Conner began going off on what Dawn was like and Spike trailed off to his own little world. He knew someone like that. She was beautiful both inside and out. But what he liked the most, was the way she'd blush when he'd mention something. Or the way she looked at him just seconds after they had kissed. He still felt her lips on his. Reaching up he touched his lips softly. "Uh, Spike.you okay man? You're not like, getting sick on me are you?" Spike shook his head.  
  
"Sorry, what?"  
  
"Oh no way, I'm not falling for that this time." Conner shook his head. "Hell no." Spike smirked, the kid learned fast. Dropping the ball, Spike sat down.  
  
"C'mon, sit down."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I said sit down, now you bloody well better do it." Conner quickly sat.  
  
"Okay, now you say you like this girl right?" Conner nodded, "Alright this is what you need to do. First off, does she like you back?" Conner shrugged, "What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"It means I don't know if she likes me or not."  
  
"How can you not know? Have you asked her?" Conner shook his head, "Why the bloody hell not?"  
  
"Because you don't just go ask a girl if she likes you or not."  
  
"I did."  
  
"Yeah," Conner snorted, "Well look at you." Spike frowned.  
  
"What about me?"  
  
"Well, you're, you're kinda."  
  
"I'm kinda what?" Spike got up and looked down at Conner crossing his arms. "What am I eh?"  
  
"You're.well you're kinda weird." Spike raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Weird?" Conner nodded, "You think I'm bloody weird?" When Conner nodded again, Spike sat down in a fit of laughter. He was laughing so hard he had to hold his stomach.  
  
"What's so funny?" Spike shook his head.  
  
"You think I'm weird when you're the one who doesn't have the balls to just go up to a girl and kiss her!" Spike stopped. "Wait. That might not be." But Conner was already off on a dead run. Either the boy was pissed, which was one scenario.or he was going to take the advice Spike offered.  
  
Either way.how was he going to explain this one?  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
You hit the review button right? ^_^ 


	7. Confusion

Disclaimer: Oh.you mean I don't own Spike or Xander? Damn, now you see I thought I did so I went into this whole big business of making them my own little slaves. But you probably didn't want to hear that so I guess since their not mine I'll just go let them out of room. Course, I should let them get dressed first right? ^_^  
  
~*~*~  
  
A/N: I know this took forever and I'm sorry to those of you who have been cursing my name for not updating this. You're probably not going to like that it's a short update (In my opinion) but don't worry I will have a longer update coming up VERY soon! I promise that I will keep up with this one. I really have no excuse except for school, sorority and the fact that I have my own original story in the works. It's on FictionPress.com for those of you who'd like to check it out and I go under the pen name, JadedCross. It's called "Take Me Away" So I hope that some of you go and check it out! Till then here's some more lovely Spuffyness that we all love and hope to see once more. (If anyone saw Angel's 100th episode and is COMPLETELY shocked email me if you want someone to rant with LOL). As always I ask that you review so don't forget that nifty button on the bottom. Thanks again!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Buffy stared at Xander, dumbfounded. She tried reasoning within her head what was going on and what Xander had just told her. Shaking her head she ran her fingers through her hair and walked towards the window seat. Sitting down she looked down toward the floor suddenly becoming very interested in the carpet underneath her feet. Taking a deep breath in she looked up towards Xander and Willow who were sitting just a few feet away on the couch.  
  
"You mean to tell me that after I told you, in confidence, what happened between Spike and I you went to the Bronze and hit him?" Xander sat across from Buffy, hands clenched together.  
  
"Uh.well yeah." Xander sighed, "I thought you'd be happy about that."  
  
"Not really Xander, as a matter of fact it makes me really ticked off at you Xander. How could you do something like that? How could you interfere in my life like that?"  
  
"I didn't mean anything by it! I thought I was doing the right thing by doing this for you! The asshole needed to," Xander stopped and slowly stood up walking towards Buffy who quickly got to her feet and walked away, "Buffy, listen to me please."  
  
"What do you think I've been doing?"  
  
"You just have to sit down and listen to me."  
  
"I don't want to!" Xander sighed and shook his head.  
  
"Fine. Then I'm going to tell you something that I probably shouldn't because it could mean that I'll be in a lot of pain or possibly a hospital bed once word gets out. He loves you." Buffy shook her head.  
  
"Xander, I cannot believe you would do something like that. Honestly how could you even think of going down there and hitting him when you had absolutely no righ-" She stopped and turned towards him, "What?" Xander ran his fingers through his hair and tried looking away from her.  
  
"Helovesyou." Buffy shook her head and she knew that she didn't understand Xander correctly. He did not just say that Spike loved her. Right?  
  
"What did you just say?"  
  
"Are you going to make me repeat it a hundred times or what?" Xander sighed, "Spike loves you. Do you get it? Will Giles loves you." He leaned against the wall and crossed his arms while Buffy stared at him.  
  
"He loves me?"  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
"For the last bleedin' time, I don't love the bird!" Spike exclaimed. Standing in front of the mirror, half naked with a towel wrapped around his waist he glared at the image staring back at him. "I don't love her. I don't love Buff-" He couldn't finish the sentence. Rolling his eyes he walked towards his closet and pulled out his black pants. He sighed and leaned his head against the closet wall closing his eyes. When he opened them, a half-naked picture of Carmen Electra stared back at him. "I don't bloody love her. I can't."  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
"He can't love me. No way. There's no possible way that he can love me." Buffy paced back and forth as Willow watched on. Xander, luckily, had to go to work but Willow was determined to stay here and help Buffy work out her problems. She put another chip in her mouth as Buffy continued, "You don't really think that he can love me do you?" Willow shrugged.  
  
"I don't know Buffy. I mean, Xander says that he talked to him."  
  
"But what if Xander misunderstood what he was saying? I mean I wouldn't put it past Spike to brag that he got little miss church girl kissing him but to say that he loves me?" Buffy finally sat down but when Willow offered her a chip, she moved away and started pacing again. "And on top of everything else Dawn has been going out more and more lately and I just don't understand what is going on anymore." As if on cue, Dawn walked into the house, but she wasn't alone.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Spike sat on the bench, waiting for Conner to show up. Taking a cigarette out of the pack he slipped it between his lips and took his silver lighter out. With a small flick of the wrist the top half of the lighter swung to the side and just as he struck up the flame and moved it towards the cigarette, Conner ran up.  
  
"Sorry. I know I'm late. There was just something I had to take care of." Spike rolled his eyes.  
  
"Oh yeah and like I don't have important things to do. I'll tell you one thing mate, you're late again and don't you think I'm going to be helping you with that science project you supposed to be doin'." Conner frowned.  
  
"But you thought of it." Spike growled softly.  
  
"Alright, so I bloody thought of the damn thing. Doesn't mean I'm to be doin' all the work. You understand that mate?"  
  
"Yeah, whatever. You know what Spike, if you're going to be such an asshole, I don't want to be around you." Conner shook his head and grabbed his basketball from underneath Spike's foot.  
  
" 'ey now! What's that about?" Rolling his eyes Conner dribbled the ball.  
  
"You're going to listen to me right now. I don't know what crawled up your ass and died but I'm not going to be a way to release your anger. You got that?" He waited a few moments. "Mate?" As Spike took a long drag he stared Conner down. Exhaling he slowly grinned and flicking the cigarette to the ground and crushing it with his foot he stole the ball from Conner and took off towards the court.  
  
"Yeah I got it. Question is, where the bleedin' hell did that come from?" He tossed the ball up, and missed. Conner shrugged as he held the ball between his hands.  
  
"I don't know. I guess just hanging out with you has finally made me realize that I should tell people what I'm thinking. Like you do." Ball hit nothing but net, swish.  
  
"Oh really?" Spike grinned, puffing out his chest a bit, "Well then, best stick around for a little bit longer mate, 'cus there's a whole world out there that could use another like me." Conner stole the ball from him and grinned.  
  
"Like you? Who said I wanted to be anything like you?" Spike scowled which only made him continue. "I mean, bleaching your hair blonde and stealing a look from Billy Idol? C'mon, what are you trying to say. I'm a big badass?" Spike took the ball back.  
  
"I'm not trying to say it." He took a shot, swish. With a cocky smirk he tossed the ball back to Conner, "I am one."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
"You're in one?" Buffy asked. Staring towards Dawn who was now sitting on her bed swinging her legs happy as could be. Looking up at Buffy Dawn smiled.  
  
"Uh-huh. I'm in a relationship Buffy, you know one of those things where a guy takes you out to like a dinner, maybe a movie or if you're lucky both? That kind of thing." Buffy eyed Dawn warily.  
  
"Does Dad know?"  
  
"Yep, so does Mom. In fact, Mom encouraged me. Of course, you know Dad, he was totally against it to begin with. Then Mom said something along the lines of, 'Hank, I think that we need to take into consideration that the times are changing and we should probably change with the times.' Something like that anyway."  
  
"Sounds like you memorized that." Dawn grinned.  
  
"You know it. Besides, this is the first time I've actually gotten to, you know, go out. Something that you yourself haven't done." Lying back Dawn twisted a strand of hair around her finger. "I sometimes wonder what it would've been like to do the things you've done. You know, join the church groups, teach bible study, not have a life." When a pillow connected with her face Dawn was quick to throw it back. As the pillow fight began, Dawn jumped onto the bed. Smacking each other they laughed as they both started losing their balance. Suddenly, Dawn stopped. "Buffy." That was the last thing she said as she crashed to the floor, unconscious.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
You are reviewing right? Please? ^_^ 


	8. Crashing World

Disclaimer: Wow, I so wish I owned them. If I did I'd find a way to keep Spike in my bedroom. Too bad I don't. –sigh- okay, break my heart more and more Joss, one of these days I'll...I'll...own all the seasons on DVD! HAHAHA! –coughs- Okay, I know pathetic.  
  
A/N: Alright, short short update and I'm truly sorry but I couldn't bring this part with any other part. It had to stay by itself. I hope that you will keep reading and reviewing. Enjoy the latest addition to Remember Me and I promise in the next chapter, Spikeness! And possible Spuffyness, you never know! –wink wink-  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Buffy sat in the cold, white hospital, her legs were shaking and she didn't know what to do. She was so confused. Nothing like this had ever happened before. She bit into her nails nervously as she looked around, trying to find some sign of life in this damn place. She hated hospitals. Her cousin had died in one and now with Dawn lying in a bed still unconscious she didn't know what was going to happen. She sighed, and looked down towards her feet. She was so nervous.  
  
"Buffy?" Shaking her head Buffy slowly looked up to see the concerned eyes of both Xander and Willow. Wiping the tears from her eyes she sighed and kept her hands running up her arms. "Is she okay?" Willow asked. Buffy shook her head. Xander wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close as Buffy suddenly broke into tears. Willow frowned, thinking she had driven her best friend to the tears. "Oh God. Buffy I'm so sorry. I didn't realize. If there's something I can do. I mean, I can try something. Right?" Buffy shook her head and cried some more.  
  
"Hey Will, maybe she just needed to cry?" Xander offered trying to be helpful. Willow shook her head.  
  
"No. I screwed up. Now Buffy's going to hate me and it's all going to go to hel-, hello Mrs. Summers!" Willow exclaimed as Joyce walked up. Joyce sent the nervous redhead a soft smile and rested her hand against her shoulder.  
  
"Hello Willow. Buffy?" Joyce looked down toward her eldest daughter who's face was buried in Xander's shoulder. When she looked up, her blue eyes were now red and slightly irritated from being rubbed. "Buffy. Are you okay?"  
  
"How do you think I am Mom? I'm the reason Dawn's in there unconscious." Joyce frowned and shook her head, taking Buffy into her arms.  
  
"No. No. You can't ever think that Buffy. You didn't do anything wrong. Nothing ever bad happened from a pillow fight sweetheart. I'm just glad that you got your sister here in time. There's," Joyce paused and sighed as she closed her eyes momentarily. "There's something we need to talk about. So if you don't mind, Xander and Willow, I need to steal Buffy away for a little. I'll return her to you as soon as I can." Xander and Willow nodded and Joyce gave them a weak smile. Taking Buffy's hand she led her towards the hallway where Buffy had seen them take Dawn earlier. She tensed up but Joyce ran her hand along Buffy's hair and gave her a reassuring hug.  
  
"Mom, where is Dawnie?" Buffy asked quietly, staring down to the floor. It was so clean.  
  
"She's in a room where they're going to run a couple more tests. Buffy, hunny, there's something you need to know." Joyce sighed and closed her eyes, "I wish there was a way to say this but I can't figure one out. God I wish your father was here right now." Buffy hugged her Mom tightly.  
  
"He'll get here when he can Mom, I know it." Joyce broke out into a moment of tears then shook her head.  
  
"That's the problem Buffy. Your father and I," She sighed, "Okay, one thing at a time. Buffy, Dawn's sick."  
  
"So we'll get her some medicine, take her home and you and Daddy can take care of her." Buffy replied. She seemed to drift back to her younger self when her cousin was in the hospital sick. Celia never came home. She'd make sure Dawn came home. Looking back up to her Mom, Buffy's brow furrowed. Joyce tried smiling but she couldn't.  
  
"No hunny, this isn't the sickness that you can just take someone home and give them medicine and they get better. Buffy, sweetie, Dawn is very sick. She has leukemia." Buffy stared at her mother. She couldn't believe it.  
  
"What?" Joyce wiped the tears from her eyes.  
  
"Your sister has leukemia. Luckily, it's been caught now and the doctors can start treatments. But you and I will need to be there for her. As much as we can." Buffy couldn't understand what her mother was saying. Dawn had what? Why wasn't Dawn coming home. Shaking her head Buffy tired dealing with everything.  
  
"Okay, so Dawn will start her treatments and then we'll take her home and Daddy and the two of us can take care of her." Joyce sobbed and Buffy looked pointedly at her mother. "Daddy will be there right?" Buffy felt her stomach and heart drop when her mother looked into her eyes and shook her head. "What?"  
  
"Buffy. God I wish I could tell you this the easiest way possible and that Dawn wasn't sick but, we just couldn't work anything out. Buffy, your Dad and I are getting a divorce." Buffy stared at the wall behind her mother's head.  
  
"What?" 


	9. Soft Spot

Disclaimer: Alright, once more, I don't own Spike or Buffy or Conner or Dawn, everyone that Joss created I don't own. Nor do I own the pretty actors that play these characters. If I did then James Marsters would be my tutor in everything.  
  
A/N: Wow. Crap I haven't been keeping up with this and I keep meaning to. I'm sorry for those of you who have been faithfully reading and faithfully waiting for an update. I'm sorry this is so short but it had to be. We're on the sad depressing parts and I can only take so much of that when I'm sitting here writing it. Sorry for the lack of upsdate, I've been on a small hiatus because of silly writers block. –shoots it- Hopefully, it will go away and I'll have a BIG chapter for you. Till now, enjoy the wonderful Spikeness. He's finally growing up! And please remember to review. Thanks! ^_^  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Spike smiled as the bint on the telly talked about how her life had to be better than it was. It had to be more than this provincial life. Suddenly, his bedroom door swung open and Spike tried to turn the television off. Grabbing for the remote he was ten seconds too late to stop Conner from seeing what was on. The teenager gave him a weary glance.  
  
"Alright, I can deal with you liking those chick flicks but you mean to tell me you actually like watching this?" Spike raised an eyebrow and shook his head.  
  
"No. No of course not. My," He sighed, "What does it matter that I like a bint that reads eh? There's nothing wrong with her!" Spike growled as he finally got Beauty and the Beast to shut off. Tossing the remote on his bed Spike looked up towards Conner to notice the tears in his eyes. "Hey, what's up mate? What's bothering you?" He asked. Conner shook his head, trying to figure out the words, trying to figure out what to say because his head was all jumbled up. He didn't know what was going to happen. Sitting down on the edge of Spike's bed, Conner ran his fingers through his hair.  
  
"It's the girl. The girl I like. She's sick." Spike looked towards Conner in complete confusion.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I mean she's sick. She's been in the hospital for the past week. I went over to her house today so she could have her homework and when her sister, you know Buffy, answered the door, Buffy looked like she'd been crying." Conner tried catching his breath as he cried, "Dawn's got leukemia and the doctor's say that they're optimistic but you should see her Spike. She's, she's so sick and pale." Spike slowly wrapped an arm around Conner and sighed. Looking down to the ground he looked up towards the cross hanging on his wall. Shaking his head he let the boy cry out everything he needed to and when he was done, Spike slowly stood up.  
  
"So you say you've got a girl that's sick that you really care about and you're still here?" When Conner looked up to him, Spike continued, "If there's one thing I've learned mate, its when your girl is sick and in need of some comforting, the manly thing to do, is suck it up, go hang out with her a bit and let her pick the movie. So lets go." Conner shook his head.  
  
"I can't."  
  
"Why the bleedin' hell not?"  
  
"Dawn didn't want to see me." Conner sighed. "I even bought her a gift and brought flowers, but Buffy told me she didn't want me to see her at all." Spike shook his head and sighed as he grabbed his trench coat. "Where are you going?"  
  
"I'm going to find Buffy and convince her that her little niblet sister needs the guy she cares about the most to talk to her and if I can't convince Buffy then we're going to find a way for you to get into that house. So sit tight, watch a bit of Beauty and the Beast, I've got the Little Mermaid in there as well so just be the good boy that you've been and wait till I get back." Spike smiled triumphantly and sauntered out of his room. Conner sighed and looked at the DVD's that Spike had spread along his room.  
  
"For a guy who tries to act tough, he's sure got a soft spot."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Buffy knelt in the church pew, rosary beads clutched in her hand. With a sigh, she slowly stood up and turned to leave when she suddenly stopped. Standing in the doorway of the church was the familiar platinum blonde head, clothed in all black, with his black trench coat hanging just around his calves. He smirked towards her and she sighed, there he was, in all his hotnes- she meant in all his...what did she mean?  
  
"Figured I'd find you in here luv, course, being that church isn't really my style I decided to stay back here. Maybe then the big guy upstairs wouldn't, I don't know, strike me down to the rubber of my shoes." Buffy kept herself from laughing and just walked towards the door and brushed by Spike. It wasn't until he grabbed her arm that she even stopped and looked at him.  
  
"What do you want Spike?"  
  
"I just want to talk is all luv, just talk." He looked down towards the hand that was clasped around her arm and let go, looking towards the ground, "I, well I heard about the niblet." Buffy raised an eyebrow.  
  
"About who?" Spike sighed, and shoved his fingers through his hair.  
  
"Your sister." Buffy paled considerably and fought the tears from coming back up. She pushed them back.  
  
"Yeah, and?" Buffy turned and started walking towards her car quickly, but Spike was keeping up with her.  
  
"And, well, aren't you going to convince her that Conner needs to see her?" Buffy kept walking.  
  
"No. Dawn asked me not to let Conner go upstairs so I'm just following her wishes. I'm only doing what my younger sister asked me to do." Spike growled in frustration and when Buffy got to her car, she trembled as she tried putting the key in the door to unlock it.  
  
"Jesus Buffy, what you're doing is locking her up, keeping her away from her life. You're acting as if she's going to die." Buffy whirled around, her eyes now flooded but the tears didn't fall. Before Spike could do much more he didn't see the hand heading for his face in a vicious slap. When his face recovered, and he touched his cheek, the heat from the sudden contact was forming into a hand; he could feel it.  
  
"How dare you." Buffy muttered. Spike's eyes widened and he shook his head.  
  
"How dare I what Buffy? Call your bluff?" Buffy tried to turn back around but Spike pinned her against the car, one hand on either side of her. He leaned closer. "The last thing your sister needs to be secluded from the world. She may not want to see Conner right now but that's where you come in." He looked down into her eyes and wiped the single tear that fell away with his thumb.  
  
"What am I supposed to do? You don't understand, seeing her, so full of life one moment and in the next she's throwing up everything she ate for the past couple days. I can't take it. I can't, I need to be there for her. Only I can be." Buffy started crying and her forehead rested against Spike's shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and rubbed her back gently. He kissed the top of her head gently.  
  
"Just go ahead and cry luv. Cry till you can't cry anymore, I'll be here." 


	10. Jealous

Disclaimer: Well now, if I owned them the show never would've ended. Nor would've Angel. –sigh- Alright. So Joss owns them and does with them as he sees fit. I can't really argue with that now can I? At least he lets me borrow them for some fun fanfiction. I hope he enjoys keeping them though, although I really wouldn't mind him giving them up. –puts in an application for Spike- First dibs? Lol  
  
A/N: Alright. Wow, An update! YEY! Everyone be happy and rejoice? LOL. Well, I hope you all enjoy this chapter, but be forewarned there is not so much happiness in this chappy because well when you have a sister with leukemia it's not the best scenario in your house. So enjoy, please review and all that good stuff. One last note...  
  
...I can't believe its over!!! Buffy was gone, and now Angel?! What was the WB thinking?! And to leave it like that!! Joss!! How could you!?....  
  
...Rant is officially over. For those who haven't seen the series finale (which was EXCELLENT!) I didn't ruin it for you and for those that did see it, I hope you will all share a box of tissues and chocolates with me. So again, enjoy!

* * *

"Dawnie?" Buffy cracked the door open just a little bit to peek into the room. Dawn was lying down, as she usually did. Thankfully today was a day where she felt she could get up and walk. Dawn pushed herself up into bed and smiled.  
  
"Hey Buffy, what's up?" Dawn looked forward to the time where Buffy and she would spend time together. That was until Buffy pushed the door open to reveal Conner standing right behind her. Inside, she felt the butterflies and inside she was rejoicing. On the outside, she frowned and turned to Buffy. "I thought I told you I didn't want to see him?"  
  
"Daw-"  
  
"No! I asked you not to let him come upstairs and you totally went against what I wanted! I don't want to see him!" She yelled, Dawn got up out of bed and walked towards her window, watching the snowfall. She heard the door close and figured Buffy had just walked in and closed it, to talk. She did that a lot now. "Look I don't want to talk to you Buf-"  
  
"It's not Buffy." Conner replied as he walked up behind her. Turning around, Dawn looked at him through watery eyes.  
  
"What are you doing here? I don't want you to be here." Dawn tried pushing him away as Conner wrapped his arms around her. "Get out of here!" She demanded, hitting him lightly on the chest. But Conner refused to move. He kept his arms around her tightly and kissed her forehead gently.  
  
"Why?" Dawn looked up towards him confusion showing through her watery eyes. She wiped the tears away. He smiled at her and cupped her face lightly. "Why do you think you could ever push me away?"  
  
"Because, I didn't want to put you through this. The last thing I wanted was for you to see me sick." Conner shook his head.  
  
"You're crazy." He wiped away her tears with his thumb.  
  
"No I'm not." Dawn argued. She sighed and fought back a small yawn. Conner slowly picked her up and carried her back to her bed. "What do you think you're doing?"  
  
"I'm making sure the girl I care about the most," He laid her down, sitting next to her with his arm around her, "The girl I love, is taken care of. You're not going to get ride of me Dawn, and I would really hope that you don't want to get rid of me." Dawn shook her head and smiled as Conner pulled the covers over the two of them.  
  
"I don't want to get rid of you. I just wanted to try and make your life better. I can't give you that."  
  
"Don't talk like that. You're going to get better Dawn. Believe me. There's no other way besides getting better. Your sister needs you. Your mom needs you, and more importantly, I need you." He leaned down, kissing her softly. When they pulled away, his lips touched the tip of her nose lightly and she smiled.  
  
"Do you really love me?" Conner nodded and she looked down.  
  
"Then why won't you just leave me be?"  
  
"Because. You need me right now, just like your sister needs someone too." Dawn shook her head.  
  
"I have my family."  
  
"You're not going to get me to leave, I will be here for you not matter what happens. No matter what you go through. I'll be there." Dawn bit her lower lip and looked up towards him.  
  
"Why won't you just stay away?"  
  
"Because, I could never go a day without being at your side. And I would hope that the same goes."  
  
"Of course it does." She sighed and shook her head, "I never thought I'd feel like this." Conner raised an eyebrow and looked down to her.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I never thought I would care for someone so much, that I'd want to push them away so I didn't have to see the sadness in their eyes. I didn't want a reason to get mad at the doctors, I didn't want a reason to be mad at God." Conner nodded, running his fingers down the side of her face.  
  
"Will you ever be mad at God?"  
  
"Never. I just didn't want you to seem me like this."  
  
"Like what?"  
  
"Weak, powerless." Dawn looked down, toying with Conner's necklace between her fingers. He sighed and kissed her forehead lightly.  
  
"Are you scared?" She looked up at him, her eyes beginning to tear up again.  
  
"To death."

* * *

Spike sat in the living room of the Summer's home. Buffy still hadn't come downstairs and by now he had heard enough shouting to know that Conner had gotten into the niblet's room. He could only hope now that everything Conner had told him in the car on the way over, Conner was now telling Dawn. It's what the girl needed to hear. Looking outside he frowned. The snow was coming down harder. It never snowed in Sunnydale and now there was some freak storm? Leave it to that bloody El Niño.  
  
"So, William, can I get you anything?" Joyce asked from the foyer that led into the Summer's dining room. Spike sat up straight and smiled.  
  
"Well, what do you have?" Joyce smiled.  
  
"Oh a whole bunch of things, but seeing the whether out there, I'd suggest hot chocolate." Spike's face lit up and he quickly stood up, walking towards Joyce he put an arm around her and grinned.  
  
"You've just made me want to marry you." Joyce laughed softly and shook her head.  
  
"It's only a cup of hot chocolate William, or, would you prefer to be called Spike?"  
  
"Will's fine. But let it be known you're the only one who can call me that. 'sides my father that is. Hey, do you happen to have any of those little marshmallows?"

* * *

Buffy sat outside of her sisters room, crying. Even though the door to Dawn's room was closed, she could still hear really well. She listened quietly as Conner talked to her, told her there was no way he was going to leave her side. Then, he asked her if she was scared. And she replied, _'to death'_. How could she say something like that? Buffy shook her head as she pulled her legs up and curled her body into a tiny ball. Her sister was only fifteen! Fifteen and she already had what Buffy had yearned to have since she herself had been fifteen. And now she was turning nineteen and she still hadn't known true love. She wanted to be jealous of Dawn. She wanted to hate Dawn, but she couldn't. Not with Dawnie being so sick. Buffy didn't hear the steps creak as someone walked up them. She felt the light touch of leather against her bare legs and as she looked up through tear flowing eyes, she saw Spike. She immediately looked away but he cupped her chin and forced her to look up.  
  
"Now, I may not be the best of people but isn't eavesdropping a bit rude?" Buffy tore her face away from his hand.  
  
"Just leave me alone."  
  
"I'm afraid I can't do that luv. You see, now that my little brother is in there making with the nice to the girl that he's in love with, it seems only fair that the big brother makes nice with the niblet's big sis'." She frowned and looked up to him.  
  
"What are you talking about?" He slowly grinned.  
  
"C'mon, you and me, we're going out." He took ahold of her hand, which Buffy yanked away quickly.  
  
"I can't leave. My sister needs me." Spike knelt back down in front of her and grabbed the sides of her face, forcing her to look at him.  
  
"You, are going to sit right here and listen to me. Now what your sister needs is someone who's strong, who believes in her and is just as willing to fight for her as she is for herself and right now you can't bloody well do that."  
  
"You bas-"  
  
"Uh-uh, lets make with the honesty here pet. You've been crying your eyes out for weeks now and what goods it done? Nothing. Now, you look at your sister and tell me she's not better off right now with just your Mum and Conner. You need rest, you need to live your life. It's what Dawn wants, what she needs."  
  
"How the hell would you know?"  
  
"Because, my Grandmum died of leukemia." Buffy's eyes widened as Spike let go of her and backed towards the door. It took her a few moments before she could gather her words, before she could figure out what to say.  
  
"Oh, Spike, I-I," He shot her a look.  
  
"Don't say that you're sorry. My Grandmum lived her life to the fullest she wanted and when I was just a kid she took me out to the woods, showed me what life was really about. She showed me there's a fight worth going after. She didn't give up. And when she died, it wasn't because of the leukemia. It was because she had lived her life out the way she was supposed to. Now you're going to sit there and tell me that your sister's life isn't worth fighting for?"  
  
"That's not what I'm saying and you damn well know it!" Buffy argued.  
  
"Well then, Why don't you live your life? Show her that you're not willing to wilt away with her. That she needs to fight." Buffy sniffed, and looked towards the ground.  
  
"Because I can't." Spike shook his head.  
  
"Don't say that, you can't bloody well say that and then expect her to fight. The Buffy I know would have never said the words you just spoke. She doesn't believe in the word can't."  
  
"You don't even know me Spike." He laughed.  
  
"Oh really? You don't think I know you? How many times have you actually seen me Buffy? How many times have you actually noticed me watching you?" Buffy looked up at him, shocked.  
  
"Y-you've watched me?"  
  
"Of course I have. You're bloody hard to get out of a guys system. I've sat there and watched you with those kids, you have a light in your eyes when you're around them and now when one of them needs you the most you go off and you're letting that light die." He lifted her chin up as he walked closer to her. "Don't let it."  
  
"How am I supposed to stop it? I don't know how."  
  
"Then let me show you." For the second time since she'd known Spike, he took her breath away as his lips took hers. Feeling the need, the want and the care behind his touch and his kiss, she let herself wrap her arms around his neck, let her fingers find her way through his hair that he hadn't gelled back. As one hand traveled through his hair, she felt her other make her way down against his chest, around his waist, pulling him closer. She let her lips open to accept his probing tongue into hers. His warm hand caressed her neck and his fingers ran through her hair. As he pulled away, she had to hold onto the wall to keep from falling into his arms. Not that it would've been a bad thing right now. Slowly she looked up to him, her lips now swollen from his kiss. Looking down to his extended hand, she shakily extended hers and let it be enveloped into his. Quickly the two of them went down the stairs and through the front door as Joyce smiled from the living room, a cup of warm hot chocolate with the little marshmallows in her hands.

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Reviewing right?


	11. Kids Growin' Up

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Disclaimer: Once again, I don't own them. I really wish I could call up Joss and ask to borrow Spike for a few days, maybe months but I can't. So here's my fanfiction   
  
A/N: Hey everyone, a short chapter. Sorry but I figured everyone would like a short chapter then no chapter. Enjoy and as always review. BTW, I get to see HP and the Prisoner of Azkaban this weekend (WOOHOO!) Opening day as a matter of fact and I'm VERY excited. I have many muses and Sirius Black is one of them. –cuddles him- Hope you all had a wonderful weekend and hopefully I'll have another update soon. Enjoy!   
  
P.S. To the girl that reviewed who lost her friend to the disease mentioned in this story, I'm truly sorry for your loss. I lost my Uncle to cancer though it wasn't this kind. I appreciate you reviewing and I admire your courage of asking me to limit my mentioning of it. So here you go sweetie, I dedicate this chapter to you. It's full of funness!

* * *

She smiled as Spike sped down the streets on his motorcycle. Who would've known that William Giles owned a motorcycle? Well, that was an obvious answer, everyone would've assumed that but who would've thought that Buffy Summers would be riding on the back of it, her arms clasped tightly around his waist. She didn't know where he was taking her but for some strange reason, she trusted him. Right now she needed him and she didn't want to let him go.

* * *

"Conner?" Dawn said softly. She toyed with the cross he wore around his neck as the two of them lay in her bed, the sun starting to go down. When he pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head she looked up towards him, "Conner, do you know why I could never be mad at God?" He shook his head and she took a deep breath in. Looking back up towards him, she smiled, "I can never be angry with him, because he brought you to me. He gave me my knight in shining armor when I needed him the most." Conner smiled as best as he could, running his fingers down the side of her face. She'd gotten so pale, and seemed so weak that he was scared that if he held her too tightly, she might break.  
  
"Then I guess I can't be mad either." She glanced up at him, wonder in her eyes. He laughed softly, "He brought you to me. Brought me my princess." She laughed softly and shook her head.  
  
"You're crazy."  
  
"Crazy in love." She poked him softly along his stomach.  
  
"How can we say we love one another? We're only fifteen, well, I'm fifteen you're sixteen." Conner shrugged.  
  
"I don't know, but I've been talking to Spike about it, and he says that when you're in lo-"  
  
"You've been talking to Spike about me?" Conner grinned.  
  
"He's the one who convinced me to ask you out." Dawn looked up towards him in disbelief.  
  
"You needing convincing?" Conner tried looking innocent towards Dawn's questioning glare.  
  
"Well, yeah." When she began to push herself away from him as if she was trying to push him off he laughed softly and held on tightly, "What can I say? I needed convincing because my ego had been shot down. When I said hi to you, you just glared towards me. Not even telling me a word back."  
  
"You said hi to me?"  
  
"See! You don't even remember!" Conner laughed softly and shook his head, "No, I didn't even have the courage to say hi to you. I was, well it was intimidating. Seeing you doing all this stuff with your sister and your mom for the other kids at the club. I had to make sure I wasn't going to make a fool of myself. And see, I talked to Spike and everything after I first asked you out is history." Dawn nodded as Conner pushed the hair from her face. She knew it was thinning and it seemed like it didn't even phase him. "But anyways, Spike always told me that when you're in love you know it. Your stomach goes into knots whenever you're around the person and when you're away from them they always seem to find a way to be in your thoughts. And you know that you'd do anything to make them happy."  
  
"Anything?" Conner smiled.  
  
"Yeah anything. Well, except stay away when you want them too." Both teenagers laughed softly as the room continued to darken, and they just held one another. Joyce watched from the crack in the door after Conner had opened it up a little bit. Her eyes pooled with tears. Her little girl was sick and now she had someone that loved her and cared for her that was going to be there when Buffy couldn't. Joyce just hoped, and prayed that she could be there for Dawn as much as she needed to be. Taking a deep breath in, Joyce turned and walked down the stairs, leaving the two teenagers to hold one another as Dawn slowly drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Buffy squealed with laughter as Spike took another turn tight and rounded the corner in record time. She held him tightly with her arms encircling his waist. She didn't know where they were going or where he was taking her but it didn't matter. She was having fun. When the bike began to slow down, Buffy tried looking around but the helmet was in the way. With a frown she waited until Spike stopped the bike and turned it off. Getting off the back he turned to her and smirked, laughter in his eyes.  
  
"What?" Buffy asked as he untied the strap under her chin.  
  
"Nothing at all luv, you just look a bit cute, that's all." Buffy let a frown appear, but the happiness shown brightly from her eyes.  
  
"Cute? That's all I am? Cute? I'll have you know William Giles that I am much more than cute." Spike wrapped his arm tightly around her and hoisted her off the bike, even though she didn't need it. Holding her close, he continued the joke, growling a bit in her ear.  
  
"Hey now, don't you be callin' me William. It's Spike." Buffy's throaty laugh had Spike's gut in knots but he couldn't let her know about it. Letting his grip loosen he pushed the hair out of her face. "What do you say we see a movie?" Buffy smiled.  
  
"What movie?" Spike shrugged and taking her hand in his, he began walking towards the theatre. Buffy looked around, it was still early in the evening and people kept running by wearing odd clothing. She became more and more confused as they walked up towards the ticket booth. She let go of Spike's hand and turned her attention back to him just in time to hear,  
  
"Two for the Harry Potter marathon please." After he paid and got the tickets, Spike turned around to see Buffy who was trying her hardest not to split at the seams. He looked towards her and grinned, taking her hand. "What now?"  
  
"Nothing," Buffy started, shaking her head. Giving up the fight she started laughing hysterically, "It's just, H-Harry P-Potter?" She said between fits of giggles. Spike looked towards her, acting as if he didn't see what exactly was so funny. When Buffy noticed the frown on his face, she tried stopping her laughter but that only made her laugh twice as hard. "I'm sorry. I just, I never thought you to be the type to be into this stuff."  
  
"What stuff?"  
  
"Kid movies." Spike glared and pulled her close.  
  
"I'll have you know that this isn't just a kids movie. This happens to be the third installment of the seven part series. It's a great book and just because you haven't read the books doesn't mean you need to criticize." Buffy frowned.  
  
"I've read them." She said softly.  
  
"What?" Spike said, leading her towards the line of people, some of who were dressed for the movie and some who weren't.  
  
"I said I've read them." Buffy looked down to the ground as they took their place in line. "There's no need to yell at me for laughing." Spike smiled, this time he was the one trying to hold his laughter in. Pushing underneath Buffy's chin, he forced her to look at him.  
  
"Hey now, I was just pullin' your chain luv. There's nothing wrong if you hadn't have read the books, just goes to show you I'd have to teach you about something else. Now, tell me you haven't watched Passion's and I'll have you tied to a chair every day for telly-time." This time both shared in the laughter and as they began to quiet down, they both turned into eager little children as the doors swung open to the theatre. They were going in to see Harry Potter. All three movies and neither of them could contain their excitement.

* * *

It's off to Harry Potter! Have a wonderful weekend and I hope to have an update soon! Please review


	12. Fun All Around

Disclaimer: If only I owned Buffy. I'd not only be the coolest person ever, I'd be friggin rich! Oh well. –sighs- I also don't own Harry Potter. Although that would've been cool too.  
  
A/N: Finally! An update! I'm not dead I promise. I was just on a huge break because of that awful thing called writer's block. I hope you can all forgive me because I have a chappy for you. Well, not a very long one but it works well enough. Enjoy and as always review.  
  
BTW, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban is a VERY GOOD movie and I'm starting a new fanfic that's an AU of that particular time, meaning it's changing what happened in book and movie three. So if you're interested, keep an eye out for it! Thanks again and please review!

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"Reading? I didn't know you could read." Buffy smiled as she walked out of the theatre, arm and arm with Spike. They had just spent over six hours watching all three of the Harry Potter movies, beginning with The Sorcerer's Stone, followed by the Chamber of Secrets, then they both anxiously awaited the premiere of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Spike shook his head, appalled at her horrible attempt at a British accent.  
  
"No luv, you've got to know how to do it correctly. Besides, that quote's over and done with. By far, one of the best had to be, 'Once again Severus you've taken that brilliant mind of yours to the task and come to the wrong conclusion'." Buffy frowned.  
  
"Hey, I think I did a damn good job and are you sure that's how the quote goes?" Spike looked towards her and thought for a moment.  
  
"You know what, I have no bloody clue. Maybe we should go watch it again?" Buffy's eyes lit with excitement.  
  
"You mean it?"  
  
"Of course I do, but, not tonight, I don't think I could sit for that long again." Buffy nodded as she casually slipped her hand into his, walking with him. She shivered.  
  
"Yeah I know, my ass is killing me." Spike stopped, causing Buffy to be jerked back after she continued walking. "Okay, what was that for?"  
  
"First of all, I've never heard you say a damn blasted cuss word before and second of all," He took his hand away from hers which caused a momentary look of disappointment on her face. But he quickly redeemed himself when he took off his duster and put it on her shoulders. She smiled again, "And second of all, you're freezing that arse off that I happen to like so much." He smirked.  
  
"Alright, well thank you for the jacket and I'm not sure what to say about the ass comment and I guess you're just a bad influence on me William." Spike winced.  
  
"No, not the name, never the name. And if I'm such a bad influence Miss Summers, maybe you should get away from me." Buffy shook her head as she moved a bit closer to him, biting her lower lip, feeling a bit more confident.  
  
"No way, I'm not letting you go anywhere. You keep me grounded. And that's exactly what I need. A grounded type person who's job it is to keep me, well, grounded." She looked up towards him, with a slight movement of her face; she pushed her offending strands of hair out of her eyes, "Besides, I kinda like you. I think you're cute."  
  
"Oh? Keeping me around because you like me then?" Buffy nodded.  
  
"You could be my own, Buffy-slave." She stopped, "Wait, that totally didn't come out right." Spike smiled and cupped the side of her face lightly.  
  
"Luv, can I ask you a quick favor?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
"Shut the bloody hell up." He leaned forward, gently capturing Buffy's lips with his own. He kissed her. He remembered what she tasted like and what her lips felt like and he didn't want it to stop. So he continued the kiss, probing forward with his tongue and she let him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, after slipping them through his duster and her hand toyed with the bottom of his hair as they kissed.

* * *

Willow sat next to Xander. She looked over at him and when he turned towards her, her eyes shot back towards the television. They had both decided to watch a movie and since Buffy had a little more important matters at the moment they decided not to bother her. Willow didn't like these kinds of movies, but she couldn't convince Xander that watching a chick flick was a good idea. She jumped as a shadowy figure walked across the screen. When she looked up, she realized exactly where she had jumped, right into Xander's waiting arms.  
  
"Oh, hello." She said softly. Xander looked down warily towards her, confused at what she was doing and what he should do. He kept his arm around her, but left it open enough to let her move if she wanted. He looked back towards the television, taking a deep breath in. "Xander? Are you okay?"  
  
"Me? Oh yeah, fine. Perfectly fine. Why? Is something wrong Will?" She shook her head and then looking back up to him cautiously she gathered up her courage.  
  
"Well, there is one thing that I think you can help me with."  
  
"Oh? What," Xander swallowed a deep gulp, "What might that be?" Willow smiled slowly and leaned up, running her fingers along his face she gently took him by the back of the neck and lowered his mouth towards hers. When their lips met Willow suddenly felt warm and her entire body was going on overload, everything she was feeling was times ten and she was enjoying it. Xander was unsure of everything, he loved the kissage of Willow, that was obvious, but he wasn't sure if this was taking it beyond the friend stage. What if she just wanted to kiss him for no reason? Girls did that right? He couldn't think anymore as Willow's tongue wandered into his mouth. She tasted like sugar, and a good kind of sugar. One thing was for sure, he was going to make sure this went further than the friends-only stage.

* * *

Conner watched as Dawn slept soundly in his arms. He wasn't sure what he was going to have to do or what was going to happen with Dawn but he was sure that he loved her, and he'd do anything to make sure that she was happy. He kept as quiet as he could and let his eyes shut momentarily. He heard the door creak open and without much noise someone walked into the room. He opened one eye and smiled as he saw Spike with Buffy. He reached up with his other arm and placed a finger across his lips. They nodded and Buffy motioned for the door. Slowly, Conner slid his arm out from underneath Dawn's head and when he climbed off the bed; he covered her back up and walked towards the door, following the two blondes. When the door was shut securely behind them Conner grinned.  
  
"So did you two have fun?" Buffy's eyes widened.  
  
"You knew? He knew?" She turned towards Spike who smiled and shrugged casually.  
  
"We had fun. How about you? Did you and the niblet get everything sorted out?" Spike watched Conner carefully, he might not have known the kid for very long but he did know Conner's body language and right now, he looked and seemed relaxed.  
  
"We talked. We agreed that I wouldn't be staying away. But how about you two?" Conner grinned as he saw Buffy's cheeks flush with pink. "Ah. You two talked and figured that it wasn't good to stay apart either?" Spike smirked.  
  
"You could say that. But we'd best be off, I do need to get you home." Conner nodded and then looked up towards Buffy, who was still trying to recover.  
  
"Mind if I say goodbye to Dawn?" Buffy shook her head.  
  
"No, go ahead, I'm sure she'd like to know you got home safely too, so call when you get home alright?"  
  
"Okay, I'll meet you outside Spike."  
  
"Sure thing mate." Conner walked back inside and as he shut the door behind him, Spike grinned and wrapped his arms around Buffy. "Now before I go do I get a fancy sweet goodbye too? I mean, I can't be upstaged by my little brother now can I?" Buffy smiled and shook her head.  
  
"No, we can't have that." Just as Spike leaned in, she sighed, "But Spike, I'm not sure that I want this."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I mean I don't know if I'm ready or willing to be in a relationship at the moment. That's all." Spike slowly backed up and nodded.  
  
"Or do you not just want to be in a relationship with me?" Buffy's gaze shot up towards his face. He was angry and he was slowly backing away from her. When she tried to reach out to him, he pushed her hand away. "Answer me Buffy. Am I just supposed to go away now?" Her eyes pooled with tears and she shook her head.  
  
"No, that's not what I meant. I just don't know if I can give you a relationship with Dawn being so sick. What I need right now, is a friend."  
  
"What if I don't want to be your bloody friend?" Buffy shrugged.  
  
"Then I don't know. But if you walk away, I'll understand." She turned and began walking down the stairs. Spike stood there, his hands in his pockets and after a few short seconds, he growled and took off after her. He grabbed her arm, and pushed her against the wall.  
  
"I'm here for the long haul luv. I told you," He smiled and pushed her hair away from her face, "You're hard to get out of a guy's system. So I'm here, friend or more. Whichever you want is up to you." A slow smiled crept across her face and before Spike could balance himself, she wrapped her arms around him and caused both of them to fall on the floor, laughing. 


	13. Ditched?

Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy. –cries- and I never will sadly. Oh well, I can always hang onto my Spike muse –holds him tightly- I will NEVER let him go.

Author's Note: Alright. I know it's been...-looks- over a month since I've updated but here you go! It's an update. Whether or not you like it is up to you . I hope that you will review and thanks to everyone who's already reviewed and enjoyed my story!

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Buffy smiled as she walked through the halls of Sunnydale High. If anyone had looked at her within the past few weeks, they'd know one thing. She was truly happy. If anyone close to her really looked at her, they'd know that she was in love. She couldn't go anywhere without a smile on her face and she rarely was seen outside of class without a certain blonde bad boy by her side. She sighed contently. Holding her books up against her chest she winced as she walked outside and was blinded by the sunlight. Shielding her eyes with one hand she looked around, searching for the one person that was the reason for the smiles for the past weeks.

"Are you looking for someone luv?" Someone whispered behind her. Buffy felt a sweet shiver run down her spine as she turned around and grinned.

"Hey you. Glad to see you found me." Spike laughed softly and leaned forward, placing a light kiss across her lips.

"Glad I found you. Course, you didn't seem to be looking really hard." He laughed as Buffy frowned and hit him lightly on the shoulder.

"I was looking for you. Just because the evil sunlight decided to block my view doesn't mean I wouldn't have found you." She looked up at him, seeing as how he was a good foot taller, and leaned up, kissing him again. "Besides that, you found me and that's all that matters." Spike grinned slowly, almost mischievously and he wrapped his arms around her tightly.

"We still on for tonight?" Buffy nodded.

"Yep. Mom's gonna stay home with Dawnie and I think that Conner was planning on coming over to spend some time with her." She grinned, "You have me all to yourself. Where you going to take me?" Spike shook his head.

"Uh-uh, not tellin'. It's not fair since it's supposed to be a surprise." Buffy frowned.

"Oh please. You won't even tell me a little bit?" Spike shook his head. "Okay. I'll be a good Buffy. As long as you promise to give me a hint." Spike smiled and kissed her forehead as he wrapped an arm around her shoulder and began walking her towards her next class.

"Alright. I'll tell you a hint," Buffy eyes widened and she perked up, "After, I pick you up." Buffy's perkiness quickly deflated.

"Aww, no fair! But fine. You're being a-a, well I don't know exactly what to call you right now but the point is you're not being very nice!" She said. Spike laughed and shook his head.

"You're being silly luv. I just want it to be a surprise. That's all okay?" Buffy slowly nodded and shook her head.

"Okay. I'll behave then. See you after class?"

"Uh, no can do luv. We're going to have to wait till our date. I have a few errands I have to run. But I'll have my cell on me. That cool?" Buffy showed the disappointment on her face but she nodded.

"Yeah, I'll see you tonight then." She half-smiled and then leaned up and kissed him softly, "I'll call you." Spike nodded and watched as Buffy walked into class and adjusting his duster, he turned and walked right out of the school. The errands were a little more important then school at the moment.

* * *

Spike looked one more time in the mirror before he reached back and grabbed his duster. He hoped that his outfit would give Buffy some clue to where he was taking her. He was dressed in black jeans that hung low on his hips and were slightly baggy. His shirt, was a black button down that felt almost silk like to the touch. Putting the duster on, he searched his room quickly for his phone and keys.

"Where's the bloody things where you leave them?" He growled to himself. Just as he found his keys, his phone rang and he rushed to grab it. "Hello?"

"Spike?" Buffy's voice rang through the phone and brought a smile to Spike's face.

"Hey there luv, don't tell me you're callin' me already. I'm only ten minutes away and I was just heading out the do-"

"Don't come over Spike. I can't go out with you tonight." He frowned.

"Why not?"

"I had this huge paper assigned that's due tomorrow. I'm sorry Spike." He tried to hold back the emotions rising up. He wanted her to ditch the homework and come out with him but he knew this was Buffy he was talking about. She wouldn't want to do that. Maybe next time. He cleared his throat.

"Oh. I see. Well then luv, don't worry about it. We'll try tomorrow night or something." He paused, "Call me if you need any help."

"Yeah. Sure thing. Talk to you tomorrow." Buffy hung the phone up before Spike could reply and he frowned towards the phone. That paper had her really worried. With a sigh, Spike removed his duster and unbuttoned his shirt. Falling down on the bed, he ran his fingers through his hair and grabbed the remote, turning the television on.

* * *

The next day at school Spike looked around for Buffy, but when he found her. She went out of her way to avoid him. A frown marred his face for most of the day as he'd go to meet her outside of her first class but she'd have already left and gone to the next one. Without waiting for him. Nothing. He was beginning to get worried.

* * *

Two and a half weeks. It had been two and a half weeks since he'd gone to pick up Buffy for their romantic date and she'd called him and canceled. For two and a half weeks he'd been trying to reschedule the romantic night he had planned and for those days, she'd called him at the last minute and canceled. It was really pissing him off. Sitting in class Spike watched the clock carefully as his leg began to twitch. He wanted out of class. He wanted to confront Buffy and find out exactly why he was being avoided. Conner hadn't talked to him in a few days but everything seemed fine with Dawn, he hadn't mentioned anything. So it couldn't be Dawn. He knew it wasn't Dawn because if it had been, Buffy would've told him. The bell rang and Spike jumped out of his chair and was out the door as if the end of school bell had rung. He quickly made his ways through the halls and found Buffy exactly where he expected to. At her locker. Just as she grabbed her last book out and reached up to close it, Spike slammed it shut.

"Why have you been avoiding me?" Buffy looked up at him, acting confused.

"What are you talking about?" She questioned. Spike rolled his eyes and locked his jaw as he stared down at her.

"I want to know exactly what the bloody hell I did that is making you call me at the last minute to cancel our dates. Meaning I want to know why you've been walking the extra mile to avoid me in the halls. Why you won't even talk to me." Buffy sighed.

"Wow. Overreacting much?" Spike laughed, shaking his head.

"No. I don't think I am. I want to know."

"There's no reason. I've just had more homework. It's like I told you. Besides that, I have different classes than you. Mine have more homework in them." Spike's eyes widened.

"Are you trying to say that my classes don't require as much?"

"No. What I'm trying to say is, my classes at least require more than showing up." Buffy turned away from him, and went to walk away. Spike reached out and grabbed her arm, pulling her into an empty classroom. As the door shut behind him, Spike reached out and pinned Buffy's arms above her head. Suddenly, his lips were against hers, his body against hers. His tongue snaked into her mouth as his hands let go of hers and his fingers attacked the silky strands of her hair. When he pulled away, it was out of necessity to breathe. His stormy blue eyes stared into hers and as he slowly let go of her he licked his lips.

"Maybe that'll remind you exactly why we started this relationship." He muttered. Walking to the door, Spike opened it and glaring towards her, he slammed it behind him as he left. Buffy sighed as she watched him leave, touching her lips just slightly she felt the tears pull up into her eyes.

* * *

Spike watched as Buffy walked home, he had to at least make sure she got there okay. With a glare he quickly drove home the second she walked into her house. Slamming doors he brushed by a stunned Anya who tried asking how his day was but by the look on his face, he wasn't talking to anyone. Not a single person. Slamming his bedroom door, Spike kicked the door, hard. Turning towards his dresser, his jaw locked into a firm frown. On the box sat the dark blue velvet box that had been sitting there for two and a half weeks. Walking towards he, he opened it, to reveal a beautiful silver charm bracelet. It was pure silver. Spike sneered. So much for really caring about her. Shutting the box, Spike threw it. The box made an affective 'thud' against the wall and fell to the floor.


	14. Three Weeks and Four Days

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, nothing Buffy or Angel wise and I definitely don't own these characters. Joss Whedon does, which sucks. But the point is, I wish I did so I decided to borrow them for a few.

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A/N: Yes, an update! I'm sorry it took so long and that it's, well it's short to be honest but the thing is, I finally got over my writer's block so hopefully there will be much more to come As always, please read, enjoy and review. Thanks!

* * *

It had been three weeks and four days. And it wasn't like she was counting. It just confused her. Buffy sighed as she looked out the window. Spike hadn't called for over three weeks. Three weeks four days to be exact and it was killing her inside. As she walked from her bedroom into the hall she couldn't help but wince as she heard the familiar sound coming from Dawn's room. She was throwing up again. The chemotherapy wasn't helping much and Dawn had already lost more than half her hair. That was the hardest thing Buffy had to do so far, shave Dawn's head. But to make her feel better, they bought her different wigs. Feeling the tears coming up, her eyes pooling up like dark blue wells Buffy quickly went downstairs. There was only so much more she could take.

Dawn was getting worse.

They never really talked about it much because Joyce was always so busy with things, she was always too exhausted from working at the Gallery and then coming home to take care of Dawn, that she just fell into bed without much more than a single 'goodnight'. Buffy was tired too and it didn't help that everyday she walked through the halls of school, she looked for Spike, but never found him. Everyday just felt like a zombie routine. She didn't talk to anyone, just went from class to her next class. Then drove home to find her sister having the same kind of day, only it got worse for her as she got weaker and it didn't seem like things were getting better.

Hell started three weeks and four days ago. And it wasn't because Spike hadn't called. For the past three weeks, Buffy had known of the fact that Dawn would probably not survive because the cancer had spread. She was determined not to let that happen so had been spending more time with Dawn and researching things and checking with the doctors. The doctors were now more confident because the chemotherapy seemed to have a few good things while there were other procedures that they could try. The only thing that needed to happen was to convince Joyce and tell Dawn about the procedures. If both accepted it, Dawn could be on her way to recovery. But the nail in the coffin, so to speak, for Buffy was the fact that Spike hadn't called. She didn't know what to do anymore. She wanted to talk to him, hear him laugh at her silliness or just look at her with his brow raised. She missed him terribly and was tempted more times than she expected to lift the phone and call him. But then she'd stop herself. He'd been so angry at her that she didn't know if he'd hang up or if he'd want to talk to her. He'd call her.

"Just give him time Buffy." She told herself, "Give him time." Slowly Buffy turned and looked back upstairs as she heard Dawn's door open. Joyce was obviously going to bed, with a sigh, Buffy turned up the stairs and walked back up, slowly walking into Dawn's room. She knew Dawn was asleep, Joyce never left unless she was asleep so Buffy walked quietly towards her bed and climbing on top of the covers, Buffy laid down next to her sister, running her fingers through her hair.

Spike smirked as he walked down the alley. He was sick of this crap, hearing things about Buffy and then not knowing exactly what was going on. He kept watching her, looking out for her. Her and her sister, the niblet. He hadn't heard anything about Dawn and Conner had been out of town for a couple weeks to be out with his family for his sister's graduation from college. He slid a cigarette out of the package as he slipped those back into his pocket. Taking out his silver lighter he looked around and then, looking down he lit his cigarette, taking a long deep drag. It had been three weeks and four days. That's all that kept running through his head.

* * *

Three weeks and four days.

That's how long ago he'd tried asking Buffy what the hell was going on and she wouldn't tell him. It was that long since he'd last felt her in his arms. Three weeks and four days since he'd kissed her. Shown his affection for her. It was driving him bloody nuts and he didn't know how much longer he could go without, instead of sitting outside of her house, he'd walk up to her house. He didn't know how much longer it was going to take before he actually dialed the number fully. Taking another long drag he closed his eyes and sighed.

"Bloody hell woman, you're driving me nuts." He growled under his breath. Looking around he sighed as he looked down at his watch. It was past midnight, might as well go home now.

* * *

"Three weeks and four days!" Willow exclaimed as she looked towards Xander. She had come to help him study for a chemistry test and just to spend some time with Xander period but the point was she was miserable. Xander sighed and shook his head as he reached into the refrigerator that he kept in his basement room. Looking back towards her he shrugged a little as he sat down next to her.

"Willow. What do you want me to do? I already hit the guy once." Xander winced, remembering the feeling of the follow days after he'd hit Spike in the face, "Look, I'm not looking forward to doing it again, but maybe they just need to have some space." Willow frowned and grabbed Xander's coke from his hand, "Hey!"

"You're not listening and until you do, you're not getting this coke back!" Willow exclaimed. Xander tried talking but she cut him off, "Now, listen. Three weeks and four days. That's how long our bestest friend has been sitting in her house, not talking to us when she goes to school. She's acting all zombie-ish and it's not working! I hate seeing her like this and," Willow paused a moment, "and well you should hate it too!" Xander sighed and leaned back.

"Will, you're not getting this though. Maybe," He frowned, "Maybe Spike just wanted to get away, you know. Get his mind together." Willow shook her head.

"No, I won't believe it. He cares for Buffy! Why would he want this to happen to her! He knows Dawnie's sick, he has to be with Buffy." Xander sighed.

"Will, calm down. What if Spike didn't know?" Willow raised a brow and stared at him, dumbfounded.

"What kind of idea is that? Of course he knew! Conner and Dawn! Hello, he had to know." Willow took in a breath, "Nobody can convince me that he didn't know. I mean he was there when she first started going throu-"Xander cut her off as he kissed her, pulling her by the back of her neck. When he pulled away, Willow looked up towards him as he caressed the side of her face, blatantly out of it. "Wow, w-what'd you do that for?" Xander looked down a moment, sighing as he shook his head.

"Listen, Spike probably did know about Dawn, as a matter of fact, I know he did because we both talked about her."

"You did?" Willow's momentary scowl vanished, "Oh, Xand-"

"Let me finish." He sighed, "But I don't think Buffy told Spike about Dawn getting worse." Her scowl returned. She shook her head.

"No, Buffy would tell him. They were getting so close, Buffy would tell him." Willow started.

"She didn't Will. For whatever reason, she didn't tell him. But the point is, he needs to know or they're not going to talk. And he's not going to listen to me right now." Willow frowned.

"Why not." Xander sighed, shaking his head as he stood up.

"Do I really have to explain why? I had a talk with the guy is all, and we didn't get along too well because of it. That's it. Okay? You're going to have to talk to him Willow, and I'll, I'll talk to Buffy if you really want them to start talking again." Willow smiled and slowly stood up, wrapping her arms around Xander's neck.

"You'd do that for me?" Xander nodded.

"Aw, you're too cute. And not in anyway unmanly cute." She smiled and leaned up, kissing him softly. Xander tightened his hold around her as they kissed, slowly leaning down he kissed along her neck. "Xand?" He looked up.

"Yeah?"

"Spike. What am I supposed to tell him?" Xander smiled slowly and shook his head.

"Whatever you want to Willow, whatever you want."

* * *

Hope you enjoyed 


	15. Here

Disclaimer: I don't own anything Buffy or Whedon like. Unless you count the Buffy Seasons One through Seven.

A/N: Finally, an update. I'm sorry it took so long but I hope this chapter is something that you enjoy and please leave a review and let me know what you think. The more reviews the faster I can add a new chapter. Thanks!

* * *

Spike growled as he saw the redhead walking towards him. He extinguished the cigarette as he rolled his eyes. Watching her walk nervously up towards. He smirked when she got into hearing distance, "Oh , it's you now then Red?"

"Spike, we need to, we have to talk." Spike smiled.

"That's what we're doing Red. Now if there's something you want to talk about specifically you're going to have to let me in on that."

"I-I wanna talk about B-Buffy." Willow murmured. Spike shook his head.

"No."

"What? Why not?"

"Because I have nothing to say about her Willow. She blew me off and I'll tell you something, she did it enough. I know when I've been kicked enough not to get back up." Willow sighed, pushing a hand through her hair.

"Maybe you just need to talk to her." Willow sighed, "There might be something that you don't know about." Spike rolled his eyes.

"Really? What could possibly be going on that I don't know about? She told me everything." Willow bit her lower lip.

"Everything?"

"Yes! We trusted one another and she knew that whatever she needed to talk about whether it be her family problems or something that was wrong with the bint that she'd tell me." Willow frowned.

"Well, then if you knew Dawnie was getting worse why haven't you gone to see her?"

"Of course I knew Daw-" Spike stopped. "Wait. What did you just say?" Willow's eyes widened and she shook her head.

"Oh no. That means you didn't know and I just," She shook her head, "I was horrible, I just, my mouth just let it all out. I shouldn't hav-" Spike grabbed her shoulders, rough enough to just shake Willow out of her ramble.

"What are you talking about Red? What's wrong with the bint?" Willow shook her head, her eyes pooling up with tears as she tried looking up at Spike. But she couldn't. "Come on now Red, tell me what's goin' on."

"Dawn's sick."

"Yeah. Well I knew that." Spike said softly. What else is wrong?"

"She's getting worse. The chemo, it's not working very well." Spike felt the breath catch in his throat. He looked down a moment as he tried to gather words.

"And what does that mean for big sis?"

"It means she's been staying home with her while her Mom is talking with the doctors to see what's going on." Willow sighed, seeing the heartbreak clear on Spike's face, "Haven't you talked to Conner?" Spike shook his head.

"I haven't gotten to talk to Conner, he's been kinda dis-" Spike shook his head as he felt the tears pool up. He couldn't even begin to understand what was going on in Conner's head. "I have to call the guy. He's got to be, why wasn't I there?" Spike started rambling as Willow just let him cry on her shoulder, frozen.

"I-It's not like it's your fault. You didn't know." She said softly.

"I should've talked to him sooner." Willow bit her lip and looked down towards Spike who let go of her and sunk down onto the ground his back to the wall.

"You couldn't have known though. I mean, if he hasn't been talking to you there wasn't much more you could've done." Spike shook his head.

"I should've pushed."

"And what, had Conner pushing you away?" She asked as she knelt down next to him. Spike slowly looked up at her.

"When did you get smart?"

"Well, about things like this it's just kind-" Willow paused, a frown forming on her face, "Hey!" She quickly stood up, "I don't know why you feel like insulting me but I'd say that I was looking at that with more of a reason then you." Spike slowly smiled, laughing just a little.

"I'm just messing with you Red. You're right when it comes to that, you're right. And you know what I'm going to do?" Willow shook her head as she watched Spike slowly get up, adjusting his duster. "I'm gonna go back to Buffy, talk to her, make her listen to me, till she likes me again." Willow stared towards him wide-eyed as he walked off.

"O-okay. Whatever works." She whispered.

* * *

Xander stared towards his best friend. She wasn't in there. He knew she wasn't. The happy Buffy that he and Willow had known since their freshman year of high school no longer lived in the Buffy shell that he stared at now. It was scary. He didn't know what to do or even what to say. What did a friend say when their best friends sister was sick and dying? He wasn't sure.

"If you're going to stare at me the least you can do is say hello." Buffy murmured. Xander looked down, slowly walking up towards where she sat in the recliner.

"Hey Buffy. How's it going?" Buffy slowly looked up towards him as he sat on the sofa, her eyes were puffy and worn from tears.

"My sister is lying in her room, dying and possibly throwing up. How do you think I am?" Xander sighed.

"You know Buffy, I hate to be a thorn in your side but if you keep thinking of the horrible things that are going on you're not going to have any hope." Buffy shook her head, glaring down at the floor.

"Don't give me any religious bullshit."

"Buffy." Xander started.

"No. You don't get it Xander. If there was any good to find in this situation, don't yo think I would've found it already?" Buffy accused. Xander looked down, rubbing his hands on his thighs.

"Yeah, either that or you let it go." Buffy scoffed.

"Oh really? What the hell did I let go of?" Xander looked up at her.

"Spike." He watched as she saw the hit of what he said making an affect on her. She looked down, tears pooling up again.

"I didn't let him go. He let me go." Buffy replied. She looked down, wrapping the blanket around her tighter.

"No Buffy. I think that you let him go." Buffy's glare shot into him.

"How would you know Xander? You hate him anyway." Xander shook his head.

"You know, you're right and it amazes me that you're having more of a passion for fighting with me then going back to Spike and a passion for fighting me more than you do for Dawn." Buffy reached out, slapping him. Xander let her do it, his face following the direction of her slap as he looked the other way. He could feel the sting.

"How dare you!"

"What else am I supposed to say Buffy? It's the truth." Buffy shook her head.

"I've been fighting for my sister."

"Really? Because all I see is you down here, crying your eyes out. Now I'm not going to say you can't cry, because you have to. We all have cried because we all love Dawn. But you don't seem to understand that you need help too Buffy."

"I don't need anyone."

"Yeah. Well if that's what you believe. I'm gonna just go." Xander slowly stood up walking towards the door when Buffy suddenly grabbed his arm.

"Don't leave me." She whispered. Looking down, another attack of tears coming.

"I won't. C'mon, let's go get some air." Xander said, wrapping an arm around Buffy, he opened the door.

Both stood there stunned to see the familiar blonde head with the black duster, raising his hand to knock as the door swung open.


	16. New Findings

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. All Joss Whedon's, though I tend to borrow them and use them to my liking.

**A/N:** I am a horrible, horrible person for not updating this but I hope that I can be forgiven. I can promise that I will not allow another six months to go by without updating. I can't promise it'll be a lot but I can promise that it will not be six months. I'm so sorry and I hope that you all forgive me. Please, read and enjoy and if you've forgiven me, review.

* * *

Spike took one look at Xander with his arm around Buffy and he wanted to hit the brunette. But deciding against it, he looked up at both of them, arms crossed, no emotion on his face. Then his eyes met Buffy's and he wanted to take her into his. She looked tired. Pale. Skinny. What had she been going through the past few weeks was what he had to wonder. What made her look like she was going to break at any moment? He sighed, remembering what Willow had told him. 

_Dawn's sick_.

Sliding his hands into his pockets he looked down and took a moment before looking back up at them. Xander had already dropped his arm from around the petite blonde and had moved out of the doorway so Spike could walk in.

"Buffy?" Xander said softly, "You want me to go?" Taking a few minutes with her arms crossed and her hand resting on her shoulder she nodded, looking up at Xander.

"Yeah, you better go." She whispered. "I'll call you or something." Xander nodded and after a few moments turned back towards Spike as he walked out the door.

"You make her upset in any way, you're going to have to deal with me again." He threatened, "Got it?" He practically growled as he glared at the blonde. Spike smirked and shook his head.

"Yeah, bloody got it already." He replied. Both watched Xander walk down the steps and down the sidewalk before they turned to one another. Buffy sighed, taking a deep breath in she looked down.

"Are you going to come in?" She asked quietly as she moved away from the doorway. "Don't forget to shut the door if you do." Buffy didn't bother looking back towards him as she walked back into the living room and sat down on the couch, legs pulled up against her body. Spike followed her in and shut the door like she asked. When he walked into the living room he noticed the way the huge silence and the thoughts of death plagued her. Buffy had to get out of this house. But that'd take time.

"Where's the niblet?" He asked, still standing as he looked towards her, leaning against the fireplace. Buffy stared down at the carpet.

"In her room. We have to take her to the hospital tomorrow." Spike looked at her, she was like a robot and all she did was give up answers. He sighed and walked over to her, sitting on the opposite side of the couch.

"Why didn't you tell me Buffy?" He looked up towards her, noticing she was still staring down at the carpet. When she didn't even answer Spike sighed and leaned back into the couch. "You could've just told me Buffy. I wouldn't have made you go out with me if you wanted to stay home."

"That's not why I didn't tell you."

"Then why didn't you Buffy?"

"Because I felt guilty." It was all Buffy could really say. She couldn't look at him for a single second and it was killing her to not have his arms around her. Spike didn't seem to have radar that told him how she was feeling because he just sat there, not moving.

It took awhile before either of them talked to one another.

"How could you feel guilty?" Spike murmured as his turned up to look at her.

"I don't know Spike. Maybe it was because I knew that telling you, you'd immediately be at my side."

"Of course I would." Spike cut in.

"And I didn't want you to waste your time." Spike stopped himself from getting up. He looked down to the floor a moment and then, grabbing Buffy's hand, pulled her up against him as he stood.

"How dare you." He growled. Buffy tried moving away but Spike's hands dug into her wrists.

"Spike, you're hurting m-"

"Buffy, for once in your damn life shut the hell up." Spike hissed. Holding her arms he stared into her eyes, as she looked up at him, fearful. "Like I said, how. Dare. You." A murmur escaped her lips before Spike let her go and let her fall back into the chair. "You think that you're inside my head and you can tell me exactly how I want to spend me time?"

"That's not what I mean-"

"Let me finish. It seems to me that all you cared about was not letting anyone in. You didn't want to give me some of your burden. Thinking that it was only yours to take. What the hell did you think I was going to do? Complain?"

"I don't know, I just knew that with Dawn, I couldn't be with you." Spike rolled his eyes, trying not to laugh.

"You couldn't be with me because _Dawn_ was sick?" Buffy eyed him warily as she looked up towards him. "I can't believe how selfish you are." Her brow raised.

"Excuse me?"

"I said, I can't bloody well believe how damn selfish you are." Spike repeated.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Spike turned to the frail body that was now standing, and he tried to keep the smirk from appearing across his face. He had her. The fire was back in her eyes.

"It means that while your little sister is up there, fightin' for her bloody life, all you seem to think about it yourself." Buffy's jaw locked as she let her hands fall.

"Why you damn selfish son of a bit-"

"Yes, I know my Mum was, well, maybe is a bitch, but then again, I never knew her very well because she left me with my Dad. Now, if you're calling Anya a bitch well then Luv I'm just going to have to make sure that you take that back." Buffy started towards him, her arm raised. Just as she began to move her hand towards his cheek, Spike grinned, and grabbing her wrist pinned her against the wall. "Now, what do we have here? Ah, the fire."

"What. Fire?" Buffy growled. Spike smirked.

"The fire that's been lacking from your eyes. See, I called you selfish because you've about given up on your dear baby sister up there and have no bloody damn reason to. Have you a reason to give up Buffy? Do you want your sister dead?" Buffy tried the knee to the groin, but Spike moved just in time, he laughed.

"Let me go."

"Not until you answer the question, Pet. Do you have a reason to want your sister dead?"

"Of course not."

"Then why aren't you fighting for her?" Spike stated. Letting go of Buffy, he backed away slowly. Heading towards the door, he grabbed the doorknob and turned back to her, "When you feel like puttin' up a damn fight, you know where to find me."

* * *

Dawn sighed as she laid in bed, staring off out the window, waiting. She heard muffled voices downstairs and then the sound of the door shutting. Another visitor that didn't want to come up to see the sickly girl that lay there, with no hair. She sighed and closed her eyes a moment. 

_Tap._

Dawn groaned and turned away from the door. Better to keep Buffy out then see the look of sadness in her eyes.

_Tap. Tap._

"What do you want Buf-?" Dawn started, opening her eyes, waiting for them to readjust to the light she smiled as she saw a figure by her window. Slowly, she tried getting out of bed, but before she could get the covers off, the window was open and a small breeze came in. She welcomed the fresh air, and the visitor. "Conner." She grinned.

* * *

"Well?" Willow stared towards Xander, wide eyed. "Did it work? Is he over there right now? Are they talking?" Xander smiled towards her, reaching out he cupped her face gently. 

"Yeah, Red. They're talking." A grin came over Willow's face as she wrapped her arms around Xander tightly.

"I knew it would work. All we had to do was get them back in a room together."

"I'm not exactly sure that's the way it's going to go over with Buffy, Will." Xander said as he took her hand.

"What do you mean?"

"She's given up Will, I mean, there's nothing in her eyes anymore. No light, nothing." Willow's brow furrowed and she shook her head as they sat down. "And, not to be total party crasher on you, but babe, there's a chance that Dawnie might not pull through."

"I know that. But I won't believe that we can't keep Buffy from just becoming nothing. She can't. She's our best friend Xander." Xander nodded, wrapping his arm around Willow.

"I know." Willow's eyes began to form tears.

"She has to be here Xander." Willow said, pulling her legs up against her stomach as she leaned into Xander's arms. "She has to be here, to see." Xander kissed Willow's forehead gently as he held her close. Willow's arms had encircled her waist and one of Xander's hands rested against hers.

Over the small baby that was beginning to form inside.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" Dawn said softly, grinning as Conner sat down next to her and took her hand softly, kissing it. He smirked and raised a brow before turning towards the door. "It's okay. Buffy won't come up." She murmured. 

"I came to see you." Dawn laughed a little and closed her eyes before hitting him lightly.

"I mean it silly." Conner grinned.

"I did. I came to see you." He slowly reached behind him and pulled out a magazine. "And I figured you'd want to catch up on all those silly soap operas you watch." Dawn's face lit up as she grabbed the _Soap Opera Weekly_ from Conner's hands and immediately started flipping through the pages. "Geeze, give your girlfriend the soaps updates and you're ignored." Dawn blushed, biting her lower lip as she fought the temptation and put the magazine down.

"Sorry." Conner laughed.

"Hey, I was kidding. Lighten up babe. So, what's the sister done for you today? She come up and fluff your pillows recently?" Dawn smiled a little and sat up.

"No. She had to deal with another visitor." Conner raised a brow.

"Visitor? I thought she'd told everyone to leave her alone. I mean, that's what your parents told you, right?" Dawn nodded.

"Yeah, but someone was down there. I heard them. Well, I mean I heard muffled voices, not them." With a small smile, Dawn took Conner's hand and put it against her face. "So, how do I look today?"

"Same as yesterday." Conner started. Dawn's face began to fall in a frown but he continued. "Beautiful." She slowly smiled and shook her head. Holding his hand she gave it a soft squeeze.

"So have you talked to Spike recently?" Conner's face hardened and she sighed, "I thought you were going to tell him." Dawn started.

"I couldn't do it."

"But wha-"

"Dawn, there's things that I just can't talk to him about, not right now. And, it's not like your sister's told him anything." Dawn froze.

"What are you talking about?" Conner looked up at her, his brown hair falling in his face.

"You mean you didn't know?"

"Obviously not by the look of confusion on my face, Conner." He pushed his hair back with his hand.

"Look, it's nothing. Probably just something that they wanted to keep between themselves."

"Conner. Tell me." One look into Dawn's eyes and Conner knew that he was going to spill his guts.

Damn he hated being in love.

* * *


End file.
